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The Book of Breakfastarianism
Commandments: And the Lord spoke thusly:
1) Thou shall not have any meals before breakfast. 2) Thou shall not forget to eat breakfast and thou shalt keep it delicious. 3) Thou shall not make wrongful use of breakfast by eating instant or pre-made breakfasts. 4) Thou shall not steal food from your neighbors plate at breakfast. 5) Thou shall not covet your neighbors breakfast nor his seat in the booth by the window.
The Beggining
In the beggining of time, there was nothing. But then came forth a mighty rumbling. Twas the stomach of the Lord, and He was famished. So He spoke. And He did say "Let there be light!" And the universe was washed with light, for the Lord could not make His meal in the dark. He then made all the stars in the sky and all the planets surrounding them because He thought they looked very nice. In doing so, He made a cluster of stars and planets he named the Milkyway for it sounded tasty. This galaxy became His favourite, so He made a decision: He going to create a planet with man upon it so they too could see the beauty he Made. After seven days and nights, the Lord was done making the planet and man. And the Lord did grin. And the Lord then did feast. He ate the skies, stars and the planets. He then spoke "This way, I shall always be able to watch over and protect man along with the universe around him." Feeling accomplished and satiated, the Lord then went on His way.
From this point on, I will join the clan of the Breakfastarians! All hail the the holy grail of OJ, and the almighty strips of bacon! Come together my friends!
Honestly im kind of offended. I'm a religious person and i dont think this is funny.
It's not an attack on whatever(guessing Christianity or one of it's religious brothers/sisters whatever) you practice!
Think of it as a similar thing if you have to lol, and it's not exactly....well I'm not going to say 'not real', may offend some breakfastinarians! But I'm going to say, 'widespread' religion? lol.
I can't joinT_T, I don't eat breakfast! Either I don't wake up in time, or, during school, I don't have time!(due to sleeping lol)
