Forums → Art, Music, and Writing → Haiku Contest - Broken Bond (page 531, due: Feb 2)
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Oh darn, well do you have an idea when the judging well happen?
When TBear responds as to the status of her photo.
Please note, that from now on, I will be more proactive in removing 'spammy' comments from this thread. I will periodically contact a moderator to do this.
Until then, humor yourself with this picture of a 'unny' cat:
I am elated to present, the judging.
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5) FloydTC
ooh, I like ya waves
boom shaka laka laka
daamn, tide, you is fine
***ONLY*** because it game me the best laugh I've had in awhile. ONLY. You have an utter lack of both capitalization and grammar, but I still laughed my arse off.
4) EmperorPalpatine
When I looked her way,
Her beckoning undertow
Swept me off my feet.
I am reminded of Narcissus when I read this. Its a very simple haiku, and you capture the theme well. The use of the word 'her' is used twice, and rather close together. This gives a bit of an awkward, repeticiousness when read aloud. Overall, a good haiku.
3) Hahiha
Unhasty seesaw
Between two forces, drifting
Away into dreams.
This Haiku captured the theme on a deeper level. The 'unhasty seesaw' is a clear reference to the tide, and tells of a battle between two sides as the tide comes and goes. I feel that the third line slightly strays from this notion a little, so a little more work on that would have been appreciated. Still, good job, and keep it up.
2) Sk8terjiff
Life giver to thirst
Drawn by sirens, to ease flame
Immersed mind, soothes soul
I found this haiku to be the deepest haiku of the lot. While it abandoneds the 'tide' aspect slightly, it really focuses on the seduction of it. The imagery is very, very good, though better punctuation (Periods!) would have contributed so much to this haiku. Keep it up, and I look forward to more.
1) MusicMan102
Watch the waves roll in.
Hear them crash against the bank.
To them, I am drawn.
This haiku really captured the theme. Its very simple, and yet it isn't boring; it reflects perfectly a sense of melancholiness that is quite refresshing. While the other haikus give a sense of say, a muted red or a light violet, this one bleeds a more blue-grey. You have excellent punctuation and grammar, so congratulations! You've won this round. Go contact a moderator or administrator for your merit.
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For all those who did not place: If you would like to recieve a critique of your haiku, message me your haiku on my profile, and please state such. Messages without the haiku will not be responded to. Thanks.
I've decided to incorporate another photo as the theme this round, and I'm proud to present one from AG's own. Courtesy of TBear 1996, heres what you'll be writing about:
-Photo courtesy of TBear1996
TBear1996, and her photography thread.
The round will close at 11:59PM AG Time, on September 18.
Happy Haiku'ing.