Today I actually put titles on my poems, because I hadn't before.
I don't have a favorite poet, mainly because I don't read very much poetry. If it's a book written in poetry, I like it, but otherwise, no.
Anyway.
You may critique/review it if you like. Or give feedback, etc. Actually, please critique it. And give feedback. Please, please, give me reasons for your opinions. I like in depth comments. (Who doesn't?)
Anyway(for the second time):
Here's the first.
Inspirat
âBe the change you want to see in the worldâ ~ Mahatma Ghandi
Life does not spring from death Freedom is not a force that breaks chains Love will not erupt from hate Power does not flow from weakness
You must make your life what it is be it happy or sad slow or fast light or burdened
You must have willpower to fight against what you do not want life does not happen, before your eyes while you watch and be lazy sitting on a couch eating Doritos
Yes, you may watch television and see what you think is life but you will never be exhilarated sitting down
You need to be the one standing at the edge of the cliff trying to keep your balance while someone is pushing you down You need to be the one rushing down the slope in makeshift skis trying to get away from your captors
No house will rise from the rubble if no one works to build it you will not eat if no food comes to your mouth
What you want will not happen if you do not make it so. (I was too lazy to finish the title)
Shadows Dancing on the ground Faceless Moving without sound But Are they really anything? The absence of light Of color Of life They seem so significant However, at night There is no such thing as A shadow If you cannot see it
See the edge of a shadow Sharp and black and white Hang it on the wall Not down low But high Like a beacon in the sky Make sure it doesn't fall Make sure it still shines bright
Bend this shadow To form a face Timeless and simple and grand Make sure it doesn't feel out of place
And now, when time is still at hand, Get the film and get the camera. We're going to take a picture.
I see her eyes Shining within the depths of Her face She seems proud, but still her back is hunched I can see her spine, her ribs Here she sits while I eat a hearty lunch
I watch everything around me. I tuck all that I see into the last corner of My mind I learn as much as I can about Everything Anything Nothing but still I want more.
Running forever My legs burn My lungs bleed My body dies But through all this pain, I see all of your urgency and I am not moving fast enough. Then, something switches and I leave my body behind I fly faster than you faster than light, and faster than even me. But then, the pavement returns the agony returns And I am not moving fast enough.
Uhh... I guess asking for feedback isn't good enough? I barely know what you guys think about my stuff, but I honestly have only gotten opinions without anything to back it up.
i like them, i am not really a poetic person, but these are nice, it shows that you can do these, BUT there arent many happy ones are there...i like your insight on these different aspects
is that a good critique(jk{just kidding} just nagging you) :P
Point me to a piece to critique. These are good, which is why I am offering. I tend not to barge in with red pen and candid advice blazing because I don't like to be on the receiving end of the whole "I NEVER ASKED YOU FOR THIS ARGH ;-;" rage that ensues every now and then when a person gives unsolicited critique. And don't worry, I'm not a terrible writer so my criticism won't be drivel either 8D
