Forums → The Tavern → Wisest Quote?

This is from a simpsons episode:

Mommy, my cats breath smells like cat food.

You can't get any better than that.

everyone has a photographic memory. some just dont have any film.

"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake." - Napolean Bonaparte (Is that how you spell it?)

Seriously, nobody quoted the great Murphy yet?

Anything that can go wrong will.

If there are multiple things that can go wrong, the one that will **** you up the most will happen first.

If nothing can go wrong, you forgot something.

With grenades, 5 second fuses burn in three.

If the enemy is in your range, you're in his.

My favorite qoute is...Video games ruined my life...good thing I had three extra lives

Heres others I really like
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.

He who is shipwrecked the second time cannot lay the blame on Neptunne.

When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in your eyes.

Seriously, nobody quoted the great Murphy yet?

as my dad would say; &quoteople are stupid"
pretty much relates to anything to explain all the crap in the world. wars, holocausts, thirst for power and money.... people don't think, they just act selfishly and stupidly.

"In war it doesn't matter who's right, it matters who's left."

Those aren't Murphy's exact quotes, they're his laws, and only one of them was actually said by Edward Murphy.

"Your mom."

-Anonymous

and

â"The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity."

-Mohandar

"I didn't go to his funeral but I sent a letter saying I approved of it." Mark Twain
and
"I love long walks especially when they're taken by people who annoy me." Fred Allen.

"Your intelligence will never surpass my stupidity"

I forgot who said that -.-

"Never try, never fail."

-The movie Robots

"Man in front of car is tired. Man behind car is exhausted"
"Man who wait for roast chicken to fly into open mouth wait long time."
"Man who jump off cliff jump to conclusion."

-My Dad

"Whats a person who speaks three languages? Trilingual. Two languages? Bilingual. One language? American."

-Memory lapse.

"I seek not to know the answers, but to understand the questions."

~ Caine, Kung Fu, 1972

More serious at the top, and funnier towards the bottom.

"He is a hard man who is only just, and a sad one who is only wise." -Voltaire

"To the wise, life is a problem; to the fool, a solution." -Marcus Aurelius

"Superstition is to religion what astrology is to astronomy: The mad daughter of a wise mother. These daughters have too long dominated the earth." -Voltaire

"Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise." -William Shakespeare

"Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish." -Albert Einstein

"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice." -Bill Cosby

"Guys, it's ok! He just wanted his machete back!" -That dude from Jason X right before being hacked to death.