Rate the above persons joke. - Armor Games Community

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2,180 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 3, '08 6:04am UTC

8.5/10 *cue drum set*

Once upon a time, there was a princess who entered a bar. She got drunk, brought two guys to her royal chambers, and had a pleasure-filled night with them. When morning came, however, the two men were apprehended. Begging and pleading for their lives, they were much relieved when the king said he would spare them if they would go into the royal garden and pick 100 of their favorite fruit.

The first man comes with a bucket full of 100 blueberries. The king now orders the man to stick all 100 blueberries up his asshole, or suffer a painful death. So the man sticks them one by one: one, two, three...ninety-seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine... All of a sudden the man laughs hysterically, and all of the blueberries shoot out of his asshole. The king is a bit bewildered and asks the man why he's laughing.

"Because the other guy is picking pineapples."

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Sssssnnaakke

1,036 posts

Scribe

Posted December 3, '08 6:18am UTC

10/10 rofl2hard
Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
American Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

French Capitalism: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

Japanese Capitalism: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

German Capitalism: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

Italian Capitalism: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

British Capitalism: You have two cows. Both are mad.

Russian Capitalism: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

Arkansas Capitalism: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute...

Hindu Capitalism: You have two cows. You worship them.

Swiss Capitalism: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

Canadian Capitalism: You have two cows. LetÃ¢â¬â¢s make a hockey team, eh?

Chinese Capitalism: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

Irish Capitalism: You have two cows. You feed them potatoes and wonder why they emigrate.

Israeli Capitalism: So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?

Enron Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.

Cuban Capitalism: You have two cows. They try to swim to Florida.

Politically Correct Capitalism: You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of the phallo centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently - aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.

Disney Capitalism: You have two cows. They dance & sing.

Microsoft Capitalism: You have two cows. You patent them and sue anyone else who has them.

Hollywood Capitalism: You have two cows. You give them utter implants and also teach them to bullet-dodge, wall climb and shoot milk out of their utters on command.

Clinton Capitalism: You have two cows. You deny any knowledge of them.

Bureaucratic Capitalism: You have two cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.

Gore Capitalism: You have two cows. You claim you invented them.

Real-World Capitalism: You have two cows. You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most "ability" and who has the most "need". Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation.

Australian Capitalism: You have two cows. You try to wrestle them.

Iraqi Capitalism: You have two cows. They are biochemical weapons.

Perestroika Capitalism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market.

Jewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days.

Cambodian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

Mormon Capitalism: You have two cows. You tell everyone that they should as well.

Military Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

Texan Capitalism: You have two cows. You teach them to fire guns.

Totalitarian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

Nevadan Capitalism: You have two cows. You charge lonely men from Arkansas to spend the night with them.

JehovahÃ¢â¬â¢s Witness Capitalism: You have two cows. You go door to door telling people that you do.

Bureaucrat Capitalism: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

Real Capitalism: You don't have any cows.
The bank will not lend you money to buy cows, because you don't have any cows to put up as collateral.

Environmental Capitalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking them.

Surreal Capitalism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

Californian Capitalism: You have two cows. They are happy.

Bush Capitalism: You have two cows. You think that cows and humans can coexist peacefully. You give all of the milk to the upper class when they have cows of their own, and the lower class needs milk.

Martha Stewart Capitalism: You have two cows. After decorating them, you sell them because a farmer told you the price of milk might go down.

Ayn Rand Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell both so that you can invest in a new dairy company. After it does well, you sell you stock and buy a cow farm.
After that does well, you take out a loan using cows as capitol and build a milk manufacturing factory. After making your milk the most sold, you sell the company and retire to Hawaii with your millions of dollars.

this is the longest jokes ever!

10/10 rofl2hard\r\nTraditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income. \r\nAmerican Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead. \r\n\r\nFrench Capitalism: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. \r\n\r\nJapanese Capitalism: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide. \r\n\r\nGerman Capitalism: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. \r\n\r\nItalian Capitalism: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch. \r\n\r\nBritish Capitalism: You have two cows. Both are mad. \r\n\r\nRussian Capitalism: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. \r\n\r\nArkansas Capitalism: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute... \r\n\r\nHindu Capitalism: You have two cows. You worship them. \r\n\r\nSwiss Capitalism: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them. \r\n\r\nCanadian Capitalism: You have two cows. LetÃ¢â�¬â�¢s make a hockey team, eh? \r\n\r\nChinese Capitalism: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers. \r\n\r\nIrish Capitalism: You have two cows. You feed them potatoes and wonder why they emigrate. \r\n\r\nIsraeli Capitalism: So, there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people? \r\n\r\nEnron Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull. \r\n\r\nCuban Capitalism: You have two cows. They try to swim to Florida. \r\n\r\nPolitically Correct Capitalism: You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of the phallo centric, war mongering, intolerant past) two differently - aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender. \r\n\r\nDisney Capitalism: You have two cows. They dance & sing. \r\n\r\nMicrosoft Capitalism: You have two cows. You patent them and sue anyone else who has them. \r\n\r\nHollywood Capitalism: You have two cows. You give them utter implants and also teach them to bullet-dodge, wall climb and shoot milk out of their utters on command. \r\n\r\nClinton Capitalism: You have two cows. You deny any knowledge of them. \r\n\r\nBureaucratic Capitalism: You have two cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need. \r\n\r\nGore Capitalism: You have two cows. You claim you invented them. \r\n\r\nReal-World Capitalism: You have two cows. You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most "ability" and who has the most "need". Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation. \r\n\r\nAustralian Capitalism: You have two cows. You try to wrestle them. \r\n\r\nIraqi Capitalism: You have two cows. They are biochemical weapons. \r\n\r\nPerestroika Capitalism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. You steal back as much milk as you can and sell it on the black market. \r\n\r\nJewish Capitalism: You have two cows. You set them on fire and they burn for 8 days. \r\n\r\nCambodian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you. \r\n\r\nMormon Capitalism: You have two cows. You tell everyone that they should as well. \r\n\r\nMilitary Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you. \r\n\r\nTexan Capitalism: You have two cows. You teach them to fire guns. \r\n\r\nTotalitarian Capitalism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned. \r\n\r\nNevadan Capitalism: You have two cows. You charge lonely men from Arkansas to spend the night with them. \r\n\r\nJehovahÃ¢â�¬â�¢s Witness Capitalism: You have two cows. You go door to door telling people that you do. \r\n\r\nBureaucrat Capitalism: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows. \r\n\r\nReal Capitalism: You don't have any cows. \r\nThe bank will not lend you money to buy cows, because you don't have any cows to put up as collateral. \r\n\r\nEnvironmental Capitalism: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking them. \r\n\r\nSurreal Capitalism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons. \r\n\r\nCalifornian Capitalism: You have two cows. They are happy. \r\n\r\nBush Capitalism: You have two cows. You think that cows and humans can coexist peacefully. You give all of the milk to the upper class when they have cows of their own, and the lower class needs milk. \r\n\r\nMartha Stewart Capitalism: You have two cows. After decorating them, you sell them because a farmer told you the price of milk might go down. \r\n\r\nAyn Rand Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell both so that you can invest in a new dairy company. After it does well, you sell you stock and buy a cow farm. \r\nAfter that does well, you take out a loan using cows as capitol and build a milk manufacturing factory. After making your milk the most sold, you sell the company and retire to Hawaii with your millions of dollars. \r\n   \r\nthis is the longest jokes ever!

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Parsat

2,180 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 3, '08 6:21am UTC

10/10 Sheer win. There is no cow level.

What did the zen master order from the hot dog stand?

One with everything.

offline

Sssssnnaakke

1,036 posts

Scribe

Posted December 3, '08 6:25am UTC

ok that's i'm srry to say this it's a 6/10

A woman and man get into a car accident. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt.
After they crawl out of the wreckage, the woman says, "Wow, look at our cars - there's nothing left! Thank God we are all right. This must be a sign from Him that we should be friends and not try to pin the blame on each other."

The man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely."

The woman points to a bottle on the ground and says, "And here's another miracle. Somehow this bottle of Scotch from my back seat didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this Scotch and celebrate our good fortune."

Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, and chugs about a third of the bottle to calm his nerves. He then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..."

ok that's i'm srry to say this it's a 6/10\r\n\r\nA woman and man get into a car accident. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them is hurt. \r\nAfter they crawl out of the wreckage, the woman says, "Wow, look at our cars - there's nothing left! Thank God we are all right. This must be a sign from Him that we should be friends and not try to pin the blame on each other." \r\n\r\nThe man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely." \r\n\r\nThe woman points to a bottle on the ground and says, "And here's another miracle. Somehow this bottle of Scotch from my back seat didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this Scotch and celebrate our good fortune." \r\n\r\nThen she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, and chugs about a third of the bottle to calm his nerves. He then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. \r\n\r\nThe man asks, "Aren't you having any?" \r\n\r\nThe woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police..."

offline

mmilano

6 posts

Nomad

Posted December 3, '08 11:38pm UTC

7/10

Ok, so there's a plane that's full to capacity flying through the alps, when all of a sudden a snowstorm hits with gale force winds, sending the plane into hysterical turbulence. The pilots reckon that they can get through it, they just need everyone to stay calm. For a while the people do what the captains say, but after 5 minutes or so, the plane starts to dip and dive through the winds. One woman up in the front of the plane is shaking and panicking haardddcore. She keeps looking around like something will answer her question: Is she going to die?
Finally, after agonizing minutes of turbulence in the mountains and what looks like a dismal future, the woman in the front of the plane stands up and shouts, "If we're all going to die, I won't die like this! I'm a virgin and I need a man to make me feel like a REAL woman in my last moments!"
A dull hush falls over the plane as a big, muscular Italian man stands up from the back row. As he slowly steps down the aisle to the front of the cabin, unbuttoning his shirt, the woman starts to feel the passion in the moment and strips naked.
The man finally gets to the front of the cabin, shirt off, and hands the woman his shirt. He says, "Here, iron this and make me a god damn sandwich."

haha

7/10\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\nOk, so there's a plane that's full to capacity flying through the alps, when all of a sudden a snowstorm hits with gale force winds, sending the plane into hysterical turbulence.  The pilots reckon that they can get through it, they just need everyone to stay calm.  For a while the people do what the captains say, but after 5 minutes or so, the plane starts to dip and dive through the winds.  One woman up in the front of the plane is shaking and panicking haardddcore.  She keeps looking around like something will answer her question: Is she going to die?\r\nFinally, after agonizing minutes of turbulence in the mountains and what looks like a dismal future, the woman in the front of the plane stands up and shouts, "If we're all going to die, I won't die like this!  I'm a virgin and I need a man to make me feel like a REAL woman in my last moments!"\r\nA dull hush falls over the plane as a big, muscular Italian man stands up from the back row.  As he slowly steps down the aisle to the front of the cabin, unbuttoning his shirt, the woman starts to feel the passion in the moment and strips naked.\r\nThe man finally gets to the front of the cabin, shirt off, and hands the woman his shirt.  He says, "Here, iron this and make me a god damn sandwich."\r\n\r\nhaha

offline

Parsat

2,180 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 4, '08 1:18am UTC

8/10 That one's a classic.

A woman decides to get a face-lift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and, feeling pretty good, stops a random stranger on the street and asks, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 32."

"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.

A little while later, she goes into McDonald's and asks the girl at the counter the very same question.

The girl replies, "I'd guess about 29."

The woman replies with a big smile, "Nope, I'm 50."

Now, she's feeling really good about herself. She stops by the grocery store to buy some groceries, and asks the clerk the question.

The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."

Again she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!"

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.

He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50."

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible! How could you tell?"

The old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"

"I promise I won't." she says.

"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."

8/10 That one's a classic.\r\n\r\nA woman decides to get a face-lift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and, feeling pretty good, stops a random stranger on the street and asks, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"\r\n\r\n"About 32." \r\n\r\n"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.\r\n\r\nA little while later, she goes into McDonald's and asks the girl at the counter the very same question.\r\n\r\nThe girl replies, "I'd guess about 29."\r\n\r\nThe woman replies with a big smile, "Nope, I'm 50."\r\n\r\nNow, she's feeling really good about herself. She stops by the grocery store to buy some groceries, and asks the clerk the question.\r\n\r\nThe clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."\r\n\r\nAgain she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!"\r\n\r\nWhile waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.\r\n\r\nHe replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."\r\n\r\nThey wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her. She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."\r\n\r\nHe slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.\r\n\r\nAfter a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay...How old am I?"\r\n\r\nHe completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50."\r\n\r\nStunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible! How could you tell?"\r\n\r\nThe old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"\r\n\r\n"I promise I won't." she says.\r\n\r\n"I was behind you in line at McDonald's."

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ParalysisTerror

793 posts

Nomad

Posted December 4, '08 1:21am UTC

JESUS, the jokes are way too long!!!!!

btw 5/10 for the joke above me

sorry, I don't have any jokes to say

offline

Parsat

2,180 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 4, '08 1:29am UTC

0/10, for not trying. Seriously, can't you look at quality instead of length?

A blond is driving around when she sees another blond rowing a boat in the middle of a field across from the road.

She yells at the boat rower: "It's you dumb blonds that give us a bad name! You'd be so dead if I could swim!"

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skater_kid_who_pwns

4,376 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 4, '08 1:30am UTC

well since you didnt post one....0/0

Ok, so there was once a man with no arms. He lost them in an accident involving blacksmithing. He had a wife and kids and had to feed them. So he went to the grocer and asked for a job. The grocer laughed at him and turned him away. So he then tryed the library, the sliversmith, and the cobbler, but they all turned im away. So then he tryed the church. The priest said, "well what can you do?" The man awnsered, I can wring the bell in the tower." The preist was puzzeled and asked him to show him. So the man ran up to the top of the tower and smashed his head into the bell. (BONG_BONG_BONG) "Ok, you have the job!" An amazed priest said. So that worked for about a week then one day at 3:P.M The bell only rand twice. The preist went up to find him, but no one was there. So he went out on the street and was a police officer standing there. The policmen asked the priest, "sir, do you know this mans name?" The presit replied,"No, but his face sure rinngs a bell."

AAHHAHAHA

well since you didnt post one....0/0\r\n\r\nOk, so there was once a man with no arms. He lost them in an accident involving blacksmithing. He had a wife and kids and had to feed them. So he went to the grocer and asked for a job. The grocer laughed at him and turned him away. So he then tryed the library, the sliversmith, and the cobbler, but they all turned im away. So then he tryed the church. The priest said, "well what can you do?" The man awnsered, I can wring the bell in the tower." The preist was puzzeled and asked him to show him. So the man ran up to the top of the tower and smashed his head into the bell. (BONG_BONG_BONG) "Ok, you have the job!" An amazed priest said. So that worked for about a week then one day at 3:P.M The bell only rand twice. The preist went up to find him, but no one was there. So he went out on the street and was a police officer standing there. The policmen asked the priest, "sir, do you know this mans name?" The presit replied,"No, but his face sure rinngs a bell."\r\n\r\nAAHHAHAHA

offline

acejammer

73 posts

Nomad

Posted December 4, '08 2:37am UTC

7/10

im gonna totaly steal this one but...
There are 3 construction workers, one itallion, one mexican, and one blond. The itallion opens up his lunchbox and gets spaghetti, he says, "aw man, spaghetti? If I get this again I'm gonna jump the building" The mexican opens his lunchbox and says, "aw man burritos? If I get these again I'm gonna jump of with you" The blond opens his lunch and says, "Aw man, tunafish sandwich? I'm gonna jump with you guys if a get this tomarrow" So, the next day the itallion gets spaghetti and jumps off, "AAAHHHH!" The mexican gets burritos and goes "AAAHHH!" The blond gets tunafish sandwich and goes "Aw crap, AAAAHHHHH!!" So, at the funeral, the Itallion's wife says "I didn't know he didn't like spaghetti" and cries. The mexican's wife says, "If he told me he didn't like burritoes, I wouldn't have given him it" and cries. The blond says, "I don't know why my husband jumped, he packed his own lunch."

HA

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Sssssnnaakke

1,036 posts

Scribe

Posted December 5, '08 12:17am UTC

8/10 not bad
this is the worst joke i could find

when can't astronauts land on the moon?

When it's full ( i made this up)

offline

Tomaas_

53 posts

Nomad

Posted December 5, '08 7:06am UTC

ehh ... 4/10 ... i dont even get it lol

ANYWAY...
One day a blonde came out of her house during the day to check her mail. The neighbour looked at her curiously, for she always screamed and cussed when she noticed she didn't have any. For ten minutes, the neighbour watched the blonde come in and out every 10 seconds to check her mail and scream, until he asked,

"Excuse me, why do you keep checking if you have mail when you obviously don't?"

The blonde replied,

"Because, i'm on my computer and it keeps saying you've got mail WHEN I DON'T HAVE ANY!"

hehe...

[i](Extra joke: Why did the blonde shake her chest in the swimming pool during the swimming race?
Because she was doing the Breast Stroke.)

offline

BVHdrummer

379 posts

Nomad

Posted December 6, '08 12:49am UTC

lol 8/10

Q: Whats the difference between a bag of dead babys, and a Farrari?
A: I dont have a Farrari in my garage.

offline

Parsat

2,180 posts

Blacksmith

Posted December 6, '08 4:50am UTC

9/10 Hilarious.

What's worse than a worm in your apple?

The Holocaust.

offline

Flippin3500

2,581 posts

Shepherd

Posted December 6, '08 4:53am UTC

I didn't get it. =P

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Bob has been missing since Friday.

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