Ok today a girl I was talking to randomly said that she was a lesbian. I asked her if anyone else knew and she said no. So what am I supposed to do since in her religion it is bad to be a lesbian.
Being a straight man with several homosexual friends (mainly girls) I have yet to have one of them admit they chose to be gay. In fact we've had several conversations on it, and they explain to me that they just find the female form attractive, as would a straight man.
Now, science has no deffinitive evidence of what causes certain men and women to be gay, however, they have determined it is not choice. If you need further evidence that homosexuality is simply part of the natural order, look to the animal kingdom. In fact, bats have the highest percentage of homosexuality out of the entire animal kingdom.
I realize some may take this the wrong way, but may I request we turn the religious down a little? Not out of disrespect, but because faith tends to blind those who follow it to reasonable discussion. Thank you.
Rapists and pedophiles are required by society to not act on their sexual impulses.
While such sexual cravings (or lack thereof) aren't connected to a specific sexual orientation, I'm bringing them up anyway.
You can change the way you act in response to the way you feel. It is possible.
That said, you don't need to throw all those references at me. I'm happily bisexual and wouldn't want anyone to try to force themselves into liking something they just don't. I'm just saying it is possible to choose not to act on the way you feel.
I would assume they were actually bisexual and just decided to go with the other sex; considering I don't know them, though, hard to tell.
I know you don't know the people being referenced...and I could very well be making them up. All you have is my word. I'll display the case that I know best...in the best that I can. Granted, I don't know everything which then means there will be info left out and holes in the story.
Back when I was friends w/ this girl in high school, she was (at least in the public school setting in front of every one) very against the thought of homosexual activity. I know this because a girl I once mistook for a guy (when I first met her) hit on her every day and my friend would always say, when the other wasn't around, "I just don't think its right. I'll be their friend, but I'm pretty sure that they're all going to hell... (other things were said, but I don't remember them enough to confidently present it as even a paraphrased statement)" and as you just now guessed.... she was (at least then) pretty religious. This girl then graduated and went to the local junior college ( a campus that you can stay on ) , and then for whatever reason ended up going wild. If I remember what all of my friends told me correctly, she just one day had a girl friend and occasionally boy friends. One of my other friends was mad at her at one point because the original girl had led on her roommate and then broke her heart... and now she's ~22 and dating a ~45 year old guy (I think her dad's 50 lol).
so, I'm not sure what her reasoning behind her decisions were. she could've lost whatever faith she did have, or maybe she just justified it. maybe she had always been that way and just didn't want a manly lesbian friend. I didn't go to that junior college or even to junior college at all for that matter so most of what I know was told to me... one of the stronger pieces of evidence I got was straight from her brother's mouth... where he told me that he told his parents about it, and they didn't believe him.
but who was ever able to understand women anyway lol
Maybe she was already like this... or maybe she lost whatever
I would say, being a devout christian, to ask her if she is ashamed of being a homosexual. If she is, should lean more to religious terms rather than living in shame. If she wants to remain homosexual and neglect her religion, its her choice. I would say to let her choose religion for it is the only thing we can hold on to when everything else has faded away.
Life is a white canvas, paint it with care and concern. - Nemo12
I would say, being a devout christian, to ask her if she is ashamed of being a homosexual. If she is, should lean more to religious terms rather than living in shame. If she wants to remain homosexual and neglect her religion, its her choice. I would say to let her choose religion for it is the only thing we can hold on to when everything else has faded away.
You do realize that she "Remains Homosexual" as you put it, no matter what? It is unchanging. And religion is a useless thing that you can have as long as you want, but it will still do nothing. A good family (Which in this case would involve her being true to herself and finding a female partner) will always be there, as the saying goes. So she can live her life as a religious lie or "be herself" and say screw religion.
I do not oppose you for your reply for its a decision to accept religion and apparently, I see you dont. I have no anger or contempt against you or your comment and on that note, I bid you "good day".
I agree with 314d1 here. I don't like contradicting people, but I think nemo12 is wrong here, though I do appreciate his politeness. Who you are sexually attracted to can't change. It's a scientific medical type thing in the brain. If her religion can't accept that, then they obviously aren't doing a good job supporting her and her lifestyle.
I do not oppose you for your reply for its a decision to accept religion and apparently, I see you dont. I have no anger or contempt against you or your comment and on that note, I bid you "good day".
Accept a religion that produces bigots like you? You are, even stating, that this girl must make a "choice", between her religion and her homosexuality. A religion like that produces fools like you.
I think its a combination of the two... choice and genetics that is. I've known gay people who say that its genetic... and then again I've had a few female friends get tired of guys being jerks to them so they went the other direction... they said it was by decision and not some urge that just hit them.... but then again it might've been and them not realize it.
Sexual orientation isn't just straight, gay, or bi. it's more of a spectrum with having with extreme heterosexuality on one end and extreme homosexuality on the other. You can think of bisexuality as the mid point. Most people won't be on either extreme, but rather sit somewhere between an extreme and the middle.
There are also those who have no sex drive. I'm not sure but I would wager that too is on a spectrum scale as well.
If anyone does think sexual preference is a choice, then try it for a week. See if you can get turned on looking at someone of the same sex by choice.
I'd love seeing an example of someone who's actually done it.
There have been attempts to raise a child as the opposite sex to see if nurture really does have an effect on sexual preference. In the end the person who conducted the study lied about the results because the child still ended up straight regardless.
It's not. It is impossible to change your sexual orientation.
Well you might be able to with certain methods of chemical castration, which allows for one sex drive to essentially be reset. It's be used to get pedophiles to stop having desires to have sex with children.It can be dangerous and I'm not sure if it could be used to change someones sexual preference.
I would say to let her choose religion for it is the only thing we can hold on to when everything else has faded away.
That would leave her to continue to feel ashamed of who she is. As I pointed out there are many denominations within religions that would accept her for who she is. Possibly even ones with in her religion. I personally think it best to just not bother with having a religion, but if she feels she needs to be in one then she might as well be in one that accepts her for who she is.
I would say, being a devout christian, to ask her if she is ashamed of being a homosexual. If she is, should lean more to religious terms rather than living in shame. If she wants to remain homosexual and neglect her religion, its her choice. I would say to let her choose religion for it is the only thing we can hold on to when everything else has faded away.
The only reason she would be ashamed of being homosexual isbecause of the bigotry people like you sprout with your self-righteousness and holy rolling. Whatever happened to allowing people to live however they wanted to live? Why must we insist on such strictures and constaints on ourselves, all in the name of something that does not affect us unless we let it. Save your god fear mongering for the fools and dullards, I will have none of it. I say let us live how we were meant to. Free to choose the lives we each lead.
Sontanavarius, my advice is to aid your friend where aid is needed. Support her choices when they are right, and be ready to catch her when she makes mistakes. Do not submit to the fear of religious prosecution, and do not back down when she faces it. Do not become one of the multitude of fantatics who scream righteousness, yet commit crimes against their fellow man more viciously than any other. In short, be her friend through and through.
I beleive that while sexuality is a highly debated topic, yet still very hesitated to be embraced, I don't beleive that someone should be ostracised for it.
