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Forums → The Tavern → Chuck Norris Facts

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Latchem
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Latchem
75 posts
Farmer

I dunno if there's one already on here (I doubt it) So I thought I'd start one of my personal favourite things... Chuck Norris Facts ;D

Fact 1:

Jesus Can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.

  • 153 Replies
shojen123
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shojen123
1,290 posts
Nomad

if you walk in on chuck norris ****ing your wife you should get him a glass of water in case hes thirsty

boom12n
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boom12n
26 posts
Nomad

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door!

GhostOfMatrix
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GhostOfMatrix
15,595 posts
Herald

Here are two facts:

Chuck Norris is overrated.

Jet Lit > Chuck Norris.

GhostOfMatrix
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GhostOfMatrix
15,595 posts
Herald

Need an edit option. I messed up the above post by making a spelling error and confusing someone with another person.

--

Here are two facts:

Chuck Norris is overrated.

Bruce Lee > Chuck Norris. Jet Li could work in there, but Bruce Lee actually beat Chuck Norris.

Kalb789
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Kalb789
639 posts
Baron

chuck norris is the reason waldo is hiding

Cranium80
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Cranium80
489 posts
Shepherd

Chuck Norris can move an immovable object

There are 3 certainties in life: Death, Taxes and Chuck Norris.

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because Google knows Chuck Norris finds you.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

iMogwai
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iMogwai
2,027 posts
Peasant

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because Google knows Chuck Norris finds you.

It's true. Try it yourself.
Cranium80
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Cranium80
489 posts
Shepherd

it's true. Try it yourself


thanks iMogwai, I was looking for that link ;-)

there's another good one:
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a ****ing Indian.
roflcopter117
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roflcopter117
94 posts
Nomad

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Cranium80
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Cranium80
489 posts
Shepherd

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/


what's the fun in that? The point of this thread is to come up with your own, or at least say your favourites. Anyone can just look up a Chuck Norris website.....

There are actually 5 horsemen of the apocalypse: Pestilence, War, Famine, Death and Chuck Norris!
Cranium80
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Cranium80
489 posts
Shepherd

Behind Chuck Norris's beard there isn't a chin, there's just another fist

Kevin4762
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Kevin4762
2,420 posts
Nomad

Chuck Norris is dead.

iMogwai
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iMogwai
2,027 posts
Peasant

Chuck Norris is dead.


You sure you didn't mean:

"Chuck Norris has been dead for ten years. Death is too afraid to tell him."?
Cranium80
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Cranium80
489 posts
Shepherd

A unicorn once made fu of Chuck Norris behind his back. Chuck Norris heard about it anyway, and proceeded to wipe out the entire species with a single well timed round-house kick.

Razerules
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Razerules
4,049 posts
Nomad

Fact 1:

Chuck Norris is strong because he trains two days daily XD

Fact 2:

Chuck Norris came onetime twice

Fact 3:

Chuck Norris Doesnt play in the sand.He plays In concrete. :O

Fact 4:

Chuck Norris won 100 games.....Backwards :P

Fact 5:

Chuck Norris can read a book by just looking at its cover

Fact 6:

Chuck Norris did the Moon Walk.....On The Moon 3

Fact 7:

When Chuck Norris goes for a swim in the Sea he Creates Tsunamis

Fact 8:

A Meteor didnt kill the Dinosaurs...Chuck Norris did.....

Fact 9:

666 Means "Chuck Norris is watching you" D:

Fact 10:

Chuck Norris wins Chuck Norris.....Double time.....

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