Forums → WEPR → May 21, 2011 The rapture occurred and all that happened was a stupid title change

so very one ok should think so because the man who said it got it wrong again in 1994 what idoit

Okay here's the story of what really happened.

Once upon a time there was a man named Harold Camping who predicted the world would end in 1994, but it didn't. So he was like "My bad, God was testing us" and everyone was like "iz kewl" and forgot about it. So he again predicted the rapture was coming on May 21, 2011 and everyone was like "OH GAWD!" and spent millions to tell everyone. But Harold made one translation mistake. It wasn't the rapture that was coming but the RAPTOR that was coming.

So on May 21, 2011 at 6pm whatever timezone, Raptor Jesus appeared.

And he was like "LOLZ RAAWW!" But thanks to a rip in the spacetime continuum The starship Enterprise showed up with the team of SG-1 from a botched Star Gate experiment. Spock was all like "This is illogical" and Teal'c was like "Indeed".
After a few seconds of research it was concluded that the rip in the continuum was caused by a combination of Kirks ego and his search for fine alien booty. So Bones said "DAMMIT JIM!" and Kirk was like "HUH WHAWT?"



Detecting Raptor Jesus Kirk, Spock, Bones, Teal'c and Ensign Steve beamed down to meet him. Then Kirk got distracted for a moment by some fine alien booty.



And Raptor Jesus was like "RAAW! DIE!"


So then Kirk said "You not really a god." and Teal'c was like "Indeed" and shot Raptor Jesus with his staff weapon. Then Ensign Steve for no reason spontaneously combusted and Bones was like "He's dead Jim" but no one cared. When they checked Raptor Jesus they found he was actually a computer.


So then Kirk Ripped his shirt and yelled. But Spock was like "Illogical" and everyone ignored him because Tandy Raptor Jesus computer was already dead. So after returning to the Enterprise, Spock used the trajectory of the sun and some technobabble to return everyone home and make it look like nothing happened. Then 6 months later Kirk died from an alien STD.


THE END

And if you don't believe me, just have a little faith.

MageGrayWolf summed it up quite well. *Applause*

This is like the eighth time it has happened. I heard the guy who spread this said he had made a mathematical error in his formula.

This is like the eighth time it has happened. I heard the guy who spread this said he had made a mathematical error in his formula.

Can't wait till the 22nd Dec next year when the mayans predicted the end of the world.

Can't wait till the 22nd Dec next year when the mayans predicted the end of the world.

From what I've read, the Mayans had their knowledge in astronomy from the Olmecs. Also, the calendar apparently does NOT stop at 21th december 2012. At this date, they simply predicted the end of the Fifth sun (5th cycle), but a new one supposedly will follow, so it's not the end of the world. You must know that Mayans believed the world would go through suns/cycles, and at the end of each one at least one couple survived and repopulated earth (Warning: incest! A single couple of humans repopulating earth after a catastrophe, as can also be found in Norse mythology for example, is always a sign that it is just a tale/legend). We are currently in what they believed is the fifth sun. If you ask me, all they managed to truly predict is high solar activity ^^

OK, I just have to post this here

A message to all the people who believed and did things like sell their house and stuff.
POWNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

POWNED

The reason the rapture didn't happen was because Macho Man Randy Savage put a stop to it.

The reason the rapture didn't happen was because Macho Man Randy Savage put a stop to it.

Ummm, he died on the 20th...

A message to all the people who believed and did things like sell their house and stuff.