A piano crashes into a man. He miraculously survives the crash with only a few broken bones. Befor he falls encounsious after crash he says "Do I look sharp? 'Cauz I feel pretty flat!"
Here's a lame joke for all those philosophers out there:
3 men are riding a train across Scotland, a scientist, a logician, and a mathematician. they see a single brown cow grazing on a hill. the scientist says, "Ah, the cows in Scotland are brown." the logician says, "No, at least one of the cows in Scotland is brown." the mathematician looks up and says, "No, there is at least one cow in Scotland, and it appears brown on one side." both the scientist and the logician are mad about the mathematician's hair-splitting until a philosopher walks up to them and says, "silly math man, I can induct from past experiences that cows are almost never exactly half brown. The rational approach is to assume that this is not a weird mutant cow and say that it is brown all over. Furthermore, I can assume that this is also not the only cow in the whole of Scotland, as in most places with cows, especially places in similar area to Scotland, there is more than a single cow."
