ForumsWEPRBreakfastarianism

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Devoidless
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Devoidless
3,675 posts
Jester

I have come to show you all the truth about our lives, the universe the end of the world. As of yet, there is only a sparse section of the holy text done. But more is to come! Have faith. Join today, and learn the truth!


The Book of Breakfastarianism

Commandments:
And the Lord spoke thusly:

1) Thou shall not have any meals before breakfast.
2) Thou shall not forget to eat breakfast and thou shalt keep it delicious.
3) Thou shall not make wrongful use of breakfast by eating instant or pre-made breakfasts.
4) Thou shall not steal food from your neighbors plate at breakfast.
5) Thou shall not covet your neighbors breakfast nor his seat in the booth by the window.


The Beggining

In the beggining of time, there was nothing. But then came forth a mighty rumbling.
Twas the stomach of the Lord, and He was famished. So He spoke. And He did say "Let
there be light!" And the universe was washed with light, for the Lord could not make
His meal in the dark. He then made all the stars in the sky and all the planets
surrounding them because He thought they looked very nice. In doing so, He made a
cluster of stars and planets he named the Milkyway for it sounded tasty. This galaxy
became His favourite, so He made a decision: He going to create a planet with man upon
it so they too could see the beauty he Made. After seven days and nights, the Lord was
done making the planet and man. And the Lord did grin. And the Lord then did feast.
He ate the skies, stars and the planets. He then spoke "This way, I shall always be able to
watch over and protect man along with the universe around him." Feeling accomplished and
satiated, the Lord then went on His way.

  • 384 Replies
armor_warrior
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armor_warrior
1,122 posts
Peasant

I love being a breakfastarian no matter how many haters there are.I say that we take our forks of power and wage war against the breakfast skippers,now who's with me!*no one raises their hands*

Zophia
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Zophia
9,434 posts
Scribe

I'm leaning more towards the pastafarianism... You know, everyone knows about the connection between lack of pirates and global heating and stuff.
But cool thing ye've got going here on AG, and a lot of converted players too. Could never be one of you~ I almost always skip breakfast~

N00BKiller
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N00BKiller
255 posts
Peasant

All hail the mighty lord of Breakfastarian! And behold the book of The Book of Breakfastarianism!


im a new member^^

J4son
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J4son
405 posts
Nomad

Welcome to the faith brotha. Get some pancakes for this fool so he may be saaaved. I need some bacon for mah meal.

Btw guys it's a forum if you don't like it, leave it! It hasn't been closed and your attempts to do so are rather futile.

Zootsuit_riot
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Zootsuit_riot
1,523 posts
Nomad

No one is "actually" a breakfastarianist. It's a feeble attempt to say "hey, I can make up a religion, too" by atheists.


Gee, or maybe some people really like breakfast. Ever thought of that?
Moegreche
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Moegreche
3,827 posts
Duke

Well, as one of the founding members, I can concur that it is a made up religion founded by atheists to mock the foundations of other religions - although all of it has become very much an inside joke.
But a feeble attempt?? Nahhhh

helloiambored
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helloiambored
76 posts
Nomad

u cant just make a new realigion people will think ur a racist

helloiambored
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helloiambored
76 posts
Nomad

i dunno why i said that it was a lie lol wat i ment was making a religion it hought was a sin not racism lol

MsterXantos
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MsterXantos
438 posts
Nomad

hey buddy now this religon is an insult if it's is made to make fun of other religons adn also that was the lamest idea i think anyone could think of as a joke on religon

armor_warrior
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armor_warrior
1,122 posts
Peasant

Huzzah for I have eaten a delicious breakfast of bacon and eggs, rejoice my brothers!

MsterXantos
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MsterXantos
438 posts
Nomad

wow you guys are cool with your made up religon pause not

armor_warrior
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armor_warrior
1,122 posts
Peasant

Guys stop flaming the whole thing is a joke, if you don't like it then don't post.

Snakebite
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Snakebite
996 posts
Nomad

This is rather interesting... Why did you start this religon anyway?

shayneii
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shayneii
2,492 posts
Peasant

Um... why is making a new religion make you racist?

People have different belief systems...

zerato5
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zerato5
343 posts
Nomad

And the lord sayeth dont salt thine egges of scrambeldness before thine has the wits to tryeth them

then the lord douth decree thou shallt not drink thine crbonated bervrages before 9ameth

(btw im a christain i dont see it as an isult i think its funny)

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