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Posted Mar 27, '11 at 12:09am master565 3,869 posts	Like everyone's said A Life Unseen is incredible. Also don't try to upload once a day, take your time, quality over quantity.

Posted Mar 27, '11 at 1:33pm TackyCrazyTNT 1,351 posts	My first attempt at a slightly different kind of rhyming...give me feedback please... Restless Sun The sun streams restless, between the trees, Lighting patterns on the roads. It shines through small holes through the clouds, Making pastures gently glow. A single ray of warmth creeps up, It crawls toward my seat. I welcome the gift from the sun, Savor its glowing heat.

Posted Mar 27, '11 at 4:07pm master565 3,869 posts	Really mysterious and powerful, i love it :)

Posted Mar 27, '11 at 7:41pm jeol 3,341 posts	Did you intend to write "restless, between" instead of "restlessly between"? I kind of like it. Really good poem.

Posted Mar 27, '11 at 7:47pm TackyCrazyTNT 1,351 posts	I intended to write "restless, between" because if I wrote the other one the syllables wouldn't match. D:

Posted Mar 27, '11 at 9:58pm TackyCrazyTNT 1,351 posts	Thanks Star, for the compliments! And also *<:0) clown.

Posted Mar 28, '11 at 3:53pm TackyCrazyTNT 1,351 posts	I tried to not rhyme in this one. Tell me how you like it! Unfortunate Acts We can never control ourselves, We do as we please, Fighting the authority Because we are bored, Stealing from the poor Though we have all we need, Committing acts We wish we could take back. And making mistakes That haunt our minds forever.

Posted Mar 28, '11 at 4:04pm TruthfulLiar 9 posts	These are pretty decent poems, Tacky. Sometimes not rhyming in a poem sounds much better to me than a poem that rhymes, good work!

Posted Mar 28, '11 at 4:43pm jeol 3,341 posts	Sometimes not rhyming in a poem sounds much better to me than a poem that rhymes, good work! Yeah, if you try to rhyme usually it doesn't come out right. It's best to let it flow. Good poem, TNT.

Posted Mar 28, '11 at 4:47pm TackyCrazyTNT 1,351 posts	Which poem had bad flow? I want to try and fix it. :)

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