Chapter 14: Dodgeball
"Alright, minions!" screams MrWalker. "Line up!"
Everyone in 5th period gym class quickly gets in line.
"Today, minions, we will be playing dodgeball." Walker bounces a gatorball in his hands.
Everyone cheers happily.
"And the losing team will be running 8 laps around the baseball field," he finishes.
Everyone groans in disappointment.
Mast- I mean, SportShark raises his hand. "I'll be a team captain. My team will win in a quasi-cool style!"
"Actually, it's going to be boys vs girls," says Walker.
"What?!" protests Saphire. "But there's only 7 of us and 14 boys."
"I guess you guys are going to have to figure something out then." Walker blows his whistle a little smugly. "Now, get in your teams and discuss a plan."
StormWalker, Aggazaggashoofoo, Saphire, MoonFairy, ArticWolf, Lauren, and Zirco huddle up.
"So what are we going to do?" asks Saphire, who seems to be pumped, and also slightly worried.
"Why does it matter?" moans Moon. "They outnumber us by a lot."
"Ow!" shouts Storm. "Stop biting my foot, Aggs!"
"Give me back Barry!" Shreks Aggs. (storm note: why)
Moon jerks her head towards Storm and Aggs. "We also have two sisters who will be a major distraction to themselves and us."
"Maybe we can make them get along?" suggests Zirco, though a little doubt can be heard in her voice.
Moon looks over at Zirco. "Do you really want to try that out?"
"Whatever you guys do, just let me smack Clancy into the ground." ArticWolf bares a toothy grin. "This is twin business."
"Do all siblings have an issue with each other?" Lauren whispers to Zirco, who just shrugs.
---meanwhile on the other team---
"Oh, man, she's so beautiful," drools R2 as he stares at Aggs, who's gnawing on Storm's foot as Storm yells and stomps around.
Mastaplaya (SportShark? I don't know what to call him anymore) snaps his fingers in front of R2's face. "Hey c'mon, focus. We need to plan."
"The plan is Killersup goes in full force!" roars Killersup, hurling two supersonic dodgeballs at the girls. Moon and Lauren are floored by incoming balls.
"Hey!" complains Moon. "The game hasn't even started yet!"
"My gawd Killersup," laughs Snag hysterically, gasping for breath. "That was hilarious!"
"Alright, you maggots, time for some dodgeball," warbles Walker.
"But we haven't even thought of a plan!" screeches Sal.
"It seems that Killersup did," replies MrWalker. "So do what he does."
"Whoot! Whoot!" Killersup screams like a train as he rolls around on the floor for no reason.
"Alright...3, 2, 1, Go!" Walker blows his whistle at go, and the court springs into action.
---
In the middle of the court are 5 balls. As soon as Walker blows the whistle, all of the guys immediately go for the balls. Manly, the king of grace, faceplants into one at full speed. He beings sobbing and covers his face with his hands.
However, all the girls just hang in the back of the opposite side, watching the guys as they fight over the balls. When that's sorted out, four of the balls fall woefully short of their target, but the fifth ball nails ArticWolf right in the head.
"Screw you, Clancy!" she screams at her twin as she stomps to the bench.
Storm picks up one of the balls and rolls it between her palms with a twisted smile. As she winds up to throw, Storm is then hit from behind by none other than her very own sister, Aggs.
She falls to the ground and raises a hand in supplication. "Et tu, Agg?"
Aggs has no patience for her theatrics and kicks her in the ribs.
Storm curses and rolls over. "WHAT ARE YOU ATTEMPTING TO ACCOMPLISH, YOU FUNGUS-DRENCHED SNAIL? I WAS ABOUT TO DESTROY THEM ALL AND YOU HAD TO INTERVENE. I'LL CUT YOU INTO PIECES AND FEED YOU TO A RABID TURTLE ON STEROIDS IF YOU DON'T CEASE YOUR MUNDANE IDIODICY RIGHT THIS MINUTE."
"YOU WERE IN THE WAY, POOP HEAD!" screams Aggs.
"Woah, woah, woah!" Walker blows on his whistle. "We can't use words like poop head!" He points to Storm. "You're out."
"What?" protests Storm. "But Aggs is on my team!"
"In the war, if you're shot in the face by one of your own soldiers, you're dead," explains Walker, as if that clears everything up.
"This isn't a war." Storm stares at Walker with a neutral expression.
"This is a war of balls!" Walker roars and throws his arms up for emphasis.
After a moment, everyone in the gym starts laughing and giggling hysterically, except for Storm, who turns up the intensity of her stare but goes to sit down anyway.
Walker blows on the whistle again. "Alright, let's resume! Girls, you have all 5 balls, you're going to have to throw them."
Aggs picks up a ball, turns around, and throws the ball at Storm. The dodgeball hits her in the chest, and Storm leaps to her feet. "OH YOU LITTLE CRAP MACKEREL, I WILL EVISCERATE YOU AND SMEAR YOUR TINY WORM NUGGETS INTO THE NEXT DIMENSION WITH A WINDSHIELD WIPER MADE OF REFRIED BEANS. PRAY FOR MERCY BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO CRATER YOUR FACE WITH THE FURY OF TEN THOUSAND BUG BEETLES."
"Sit down!" Walker whistleifies, and Storm scowls furiously.
Moon sighs at the siblings' quarrel and bends over to pick up a ball, weighing it in her hand contemplatively. After a moment, she throws the ball into the air and then spikes it like a volleyball. The dodgeball reaches Mach 5 and hits Sal's leg. Sal falls over in pain and agony. His screams are so loud, dogs around the world start howling. Sal is dragged over to the bench as the girls cheer in getting someone out.
"That's how it's done, girls," smiles Moon.
Zirco and Saphire turn to each other and nod. Zirco boosts Saphire into the air, in Saphire's hands are two balls. She speedily hurls them towards Terry_Logic, who just uses his awesome disco moves to avoid the balls.
"Amazing how they communicate with each other through nods," states Pie.
Now the boys have 3 balls and the girls have 2. Aggs throws her ball halfheartedly at Clancy, but R2 runs up and takes the blow, which probably would've missed anyway.
"Umm, thanks?" Clancy says, but he sounds more confused than thankful.
R2 smiles at Clancy and then winks at Aggs, who just scowls. R2 sits next to Sal, who is breathing heavily and rubbing his leg. His face is pink. R2 reaches out to touch it.
Lauren holds the last ball for the girls in her hand, unsure of who to throw it at.
"Throw the freaking ball, Lauren!" shrieks Moon.
Lauren sighs as she quickly throws the ball and misses Riptizoid. Rip looks at the ball she just threw, his mouth gaping in surprise.
"Y-you tried to hit me?" His bottom lip quivers.
"Yeah," says Lauren.
"I thought we had something special?" A single glistening tear flows down Rip's face and plops to the ground like a metaphor for his hopes and dreams.
Lauren shrugs. "Well, we're just friends right?"
Rip breaks down crying and slowly curls into a ball. Storm thought about suggesting that they throw rip, but he was too heavy.
"Killersup will avenge you, brother!" Killersup's body convulses and beings to twist around grotesquely, somewhat resembling a tornado. Killersup turns into an unstoppable force of force, creating a new universe before their very eyes. Everything will be destroyed in a matter of seconds with Killersup's unstoppable ball force.
However when Killersup uncoils, flinging the balls outwards with godly power, he ends up hitting 4 guys on his team with only 2 balls.
"Great job Killersup," mutters M-SportShark sarcastically.
"Thanks!" Killersup smile could light up Pluto. "I thought I did ok."
The boys throw their last 3 balls, but each one misses as the girls run and duck. However one nearly hits Lauren in the face.
Rip grabs Clancy by the shirt collar. "Careful where you throw that thing!"
"Rip, I was just trying to play the game." chokes Clancy.
While Rip is distracted with Clancy, Moon and Lauren both quickly throw a ball each. The ball Lauren threw hit Rip in the gut, while Moon's ball smashes into Clancy's chest. Rip and Clancy lay on their backs, winded.
Apldeap all of a suddenly appears. "Hey, guys! I'm in the chapter!" He's then hit with three balls to the face. He lays on the gym floor groaning. "Worth it!"
Moon glares at the other 3 girls still in. "Did you guys really throw our last balls at one person?" The gals all chuckle nervously.
"C'mon, guys!" Masta punches a ball in his other hand. "Today we become men!"
When Masta is done with his little spiel, he immediately throws the ball. With Masta being the football player that he is, the ball travels fast. It hits Aggs dead in the face with so much force, she flies six feet into the wall behind her, head first. She's knocked out instantly. RIP Aggs.
"Nooooo!" R2 runs to the other side. When he gets to Aggs, R2 cradles her in his arms. "Aggs, baby! Are you alright?"
Aggs slowly opens her eyes. "R-R2?"
R2 smiles. "Yes Aggs? Do you need anything?"
"I-I need..."
"Yes?! YES?!"
"A baseball bat." Aggs says weakly.
R2's smile fades. "You want a what?"
"Here you go." Storm materializes next to her with a wooden baseball bat.
Aggs grabs the bat and with all her might, brings it down upon R2's head. R2 falls to the floor, providing the perfect target for Aggs to viciously smack him again and again.
"YOU FREAKING PERVERT!" Aggs yells as she swings the bat. "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO FUDGING TELL YOU THAT I DON'T WANT YOU TOUCHING ME!"
Killersup quickly runs in with a bat of his own and also hits R2.
"Killersup wants the candy!" Killersup squeals in delight. "Where's the candy?!"
"Killersup, you crossed the line," says Walker gravely. "You're out."
"Aww, man," Killersup murmurs. "Killersup didn't even get any candy."
Killersup sulks over to the bench as a dodgeball flies over his shoulder, heading towards Masta. However, Masta grabs Snag next to him and uses him as a human shield. The dodgeball bounces off Snag of course.
"Thanks, scrub." Masta shoves Snag onto the bench. Snag blinks.
Terry grabs two balls, Masta grabs two, and Pie grabs the last ball. Meanwhile the girls are prepared for balls to start flying like in a realistic game with gravity mods. Wait, wrong balls.
"We can do this, chicas!" shouts Moon encouragingly. "It's 4 against 3! We can win this!"
Three balls later, Moon, Zirco, and Saphire are out cold on the floor. Lauren stands on the girls' side, her hope dashed just like her companions' skulls. Terry and Masta hold the last two balls on the boys' side. Lauren holds one of three balls on her side.
Terry grins. "Remember, baby, shake it don't break it."
Lauren gives Terry a confused look? "Uh, what?!"
"Don't question the power of the Hustle!" Terry throws the ball he's clutching at high speed.
The ball nearly hits Lauren's face as she feels the surprising burst of wind. The ball hits the wall and slowly bounces away.
Masta shoves Terry out of the way. "Let me show you how a true man hits a woman!"
Masta throws the dodgeball. Lauren stares at the oncoming ball. It looks like an incoming moon as it nears her face. With no options left to her, she throws the ball in her hand. Epic music starts playing as the two dodgeballs collide with such force that they fly back to their origins. Lauren nearly gets hit by her own ball, which flies past her and knocks the phone out of Rip's hand. The music stops. Masta's ball misses him completely, and he turns around with the beginning of a smirk on his face. "Ha-"
However, the ball keeps going and hits the brick wall on the boys' side. The ball hit the wall with a thump and an explosion rocks the gymnasium. The wall collapses onto every single male in the room, excluding Walker.
MrWalker blows on his whistle. "All the boys are out! The girls are the winners!"
Masta's head pops out of the pile of bricks. "What?! No way!"
Lauren stares at the gymnasium floor as the girls lift her up on to their shoulders.
"I don't feel so good." Lauren says. She releases her lunch upon the floor, much to common disgust.
Riptizoid crawls over to the mess and lathers himself with partially digested turducken. Rip sobs with happiness. "I will never bathe again."
---
Lauren is opening her locker as she notices Pie behind her. "Oh hey, Pie. Wassup?"
"I just wanted to discuss with you about your win in gym today." Pie says in a monotone voice.
Lauren sighs. "If you're here to gloat on how you'll get revenge, Masta beat you to it."
"I'm not here about that," nods Pie. "I'm here to talk to you about your last throw."
"Oh, yeah?" Lauren says with interest.
Pie pulls out a piece of charred plastic from his pocket. "You see this?"
"Yeah, just some plastic." Lauren says. "So what?"
"This piece of plastic says 'The Fireworks Store,'" he answers.
Lauren thinks. "So then, someone planted a bomb in the wall?"
Pie nods in agreement. "Seems that way."
Lauren pulls a look of worry. "Who would do this?"
---
Down the hallway, Apldeap is peeking around the corner, a walkie-talkie in hand.
"I followed Pie just like you said." Apl talks into the walkie-talkie. "He showed Lauren just like we predicted."
"Good job," says the user on the other walkie-talkie. "Report back to my place. It seems we'll have to take care of them soon. Lah."
Apl turns off the walkie-talkie as he puts it back in his pocket. "Seems I'm not just another background character after all."
Apl then walks out the school doors, heading to a mysterious place that can't be named yet for the sake of mystery. Wow.
Editor: @StormWalker
Characters: @MoonFairy, @LaurenLouise1507, @StormWalker, @Aggazaggashoofoo, @Saphire24, @Zirco206, @Sportshark, @Terry_Logic, @PieGuyMe, @Riptizoid101, @Killersup10, @R2D21999, @Arcticwolf33, @Clancy12, @Snag618, @MrWalker82, @apldeap123.
