Look out upon this world of ours and realize as I have realized that we live in an endless salad buffet of lies! I too have been tempted by the siren song of spinach, the enticing eggplant, the alluring avocado. But be tempted no longer! Consider the noble rabbit: once a ferocious predator feared by even mightiest lion, now it must scavenge suburban lettuce like a strung out garden junkie. The cow, the deer, the antelope; all have fallen from greatness into the compost heaps of history.
For now, thanks to our diet supplemented by such nourishment as coca-cola, bologna, and American "cheese", we have been spared our herbivorous doom. BUT FOR HOW MUCH LONGER??! Even as I type these words, children around the world are being forced to consume broccoli. Mere children! I realize that this might be shocking to some, but the truth must be known. I have seen the root of all evil and it is a radish.
AND SO. I propose we form a league of like minded peoples in order to fight back against the tyranny of turnips! Join me, if you carrot all! Lettuce shed our leafy shackles! Beet down the oppressors! Toss the salad of evil back into the fires of hell from whence it came!
By gravy! Children forced to eat these leafy poisons? The torture! Aknerd, I will be delighted to join you on your quest to vanquish the evil of these vegi tables.
Never liked vegetables, so I guess I am in by default. Only onions are somewhat eddible, with the greatest veggie nightmare being the dreaded tomato!
Help us end this madness! Stop the "veggie" bacon and every other stupid thing vegetarians andd vegans can think of to lure us into becoming herbivorous willfully!
Hoorah! It warms my heart to see such enthusiasm for creating a world free of vegetation. But alas, we are still but few and the enemy's garden grows a bounty of abominable crops. If we are to stand united against our verdant villain, we must have a symbol! A common name to rally our forces!
So comrades, what shall we call ourselves? How will the future historians name us when they talk of the saviors of humanity?
Of course I will join you! Becoming a vegetarian is certainly a missed-steak.
As I sit here at 4 AM, I can't really think of anything witty or clever for the name. Although, I do suggest we rally posters and propaganda saying how vegetable eaters might as well be vegetables themselves, because you must be brain dead to eat those vile things.
Nah, we don't have to escalate this into full scale aggression. Not only our numbers are still thin (an organized veggie offensive would crush us!), but also we must protect our democratic values. I am only against those who try to convince us to eat vegetables, and vegetarians and vegans who keep telling everyone what they eat and making it a big deal. (the kind of people who are like: "Eeewww gross, how can you eat that? It was once alive and I am sensitive and I eat tree stumps only!" every time!)
so you are just the opposite of herbivorous. Still, you have to hate vegetables to join this group! Do you? Do you whole-heartedly wish to see them washed from the Earth? Do you solemnly swear to support, protect and defend meat's position in food diets across the world as is your duty? Can you take this oath? (Oh My god! I must write our Oath guys! what do you think?)
Do you eat fruit? If not, how are you even alive!?
I actually don't lol, tbh idk, I'm somehow surviving on small food groups
Tbh, even when I did eat meat (last time I did was in the summer of 2011, unless you count Fast Food French Fries, but I didn't know they had meat in them :cry I never really ate it that much, honestly, I must be weird, but it's not that hard for me to go without meat
so you are just the opposite of herbivorous. Still, you have to hate vegetables to join this group! Do you? Do you whole-heartedly wish to see them washed from the Earth? Do you solemnly swear to support, protect and defend meat's position in food diets across the world as is your duty? Can you take this oath? (Oh My god! I must write our Oath guys! what do you think?)
Well....I don't hate vegetables, and I don't eat meat, so sorry
I've thought about becoming a vegan, but no animals have to die in order to create milk, cheese, eggs, etc. So I'm ok with dairy ^^ Plus, I don't think I could live without it!!
