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The Book of Breakfastarianism
Commandments: And the Lord spoke thusly:
1) Thou shall not have any meals before breakfast. 2) Thou shall not forget to eat breakfast and thou shalt keep it delicious. 3) Thou shall not make wrongful use of breakfast by eating instant or pre-made breakfasts. 4) Thou shall not steal food from your neighbors plate at breakfast. 5) Thou shall not covet your neighbors breakfast nor his seat in the booth by the window.
The Beggining
In the beggining of time, there was nothing. But then came forth a mighty rumbling. Twas the stomach of the Lord, and He was famished. So He spoke. And He did say "Let there be light!" And the universe was washed with light, for the Lord could not make His meal in the dark. He then made all the stars in the sky and all the planets surrounding them because He thought they looked very nice. In doing so, He made a cluster of stars and planets he named the Milkyway for it sounded tasty. This galaxy became His favourite, so He made a decision: He going to create a planet with man upon it so they too could see the beauty he Made. After seven days and nights, the Lord was done making the planet and man. And the Lord did grin. And the Lord then did feast. He ate the skies, stars and the planets. He then spoke "This way, I shall always be able to watch over and protect man along with the universe around him." Feeling accomplished and satiated, the Lord then went on His way.
I wish that all meals were a healthy and nutritious part of your daily meals in commercials, without the clause that they are using more important things in the picture such as fruit milk and juices to make up for the unhealthy factors of their terrible breakfast Cereal...
This is making me hungry... Does this mean that pig is both good and evil because it contains bacon AND roast?
*stomach rumbles*... And the Lord doth say "I hath called thy divine place of warship for dining 'IHOP'. Cherish this well, and give generous tribute to those working there".
