I have come to show you all the truth about our lives, the universe the end of the world. As of yet, there is only a sparse section of the holy text done. But more is to come! Have faith. Join today, and learn the truth!
The Book of Breakfastarianism
Commandments: And the Lord spoke thusly:
1) Thou shall not have any meals before breakfast. 2) Thou shall not forget to eat breakfast and thou shalt keep it delicious. 3) Thou shall not make wrongful use of breakfast by eating instant or pre-made breakfasts. 4) Thou shall not steal food from your neighbors plate at breakfast. 5) Thou shall not covet your neighbors breakfast nor his seat in the booth by the window.
The Beggining
In the beggining of time, there was nothing. But then came forth a mighty rumbling. Twas the stomach of the Lord, and He was famished. So He spoke. And He did say "Let there be light!" And the universe was washed with light, for the Lord could not make His meal in the dark. He then made all the stars in the sky and all the planets surrounding them because He thought they looked very nice. In doing so, He made a cluster of stars and planets he named the Milkyway for it sounded tasty. This galaxy became His favourite, so He made a decision: He going to create a planet with man upon it so they too could see the beauty he Made. After seven days and nights, the Lord was done making the planet and man. And the Lord did grin. And the Lord then did feast. He ate the skies, stars and the planets. He then spoke "This way, I shall always be able to watch over and protect man along with the universe around him." Feeling accomplished and satiated, the Lord then went on His way.
Kellogg Ann Butterworth Brown (farmer) General Mill The Quaker Man Together these 5 disciples wrote a collection of their stories and formed all of them to create the new testament of the Breakfastarian Bible.
There is an opposite to everything! And we are your opposite! And that's not a good enough hit list! Oh and you forgot Hungry Jack... But don't worry... he's already dead!
Any breakfastarians can copy my ode to breakfast.Just don't forget to mentoin I made it. Any antibreakfestarians can only burn in hell!!!MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!VIVA DE LA BREAKFAST!!!
all you anti breakfastarians shall be sent to hell in the end of days and be served only grease and pre-made sugary confections for the rest of eternity...so sayeth the almighty book of breakfastarianism.
