ForumsWEPRBeing condemned for my beliefs?

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whyismynametom
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whyismynametom
263 posts
Nomad

I hear all this talking about "GAYS" and it seems anyone who doesn't like it is considered a "hater" of the gays. I find the "lifestyle" of gays to be disgusting. This is my opinion, am i not in-tilted to it? I'm merely saying it is disgusting not that gays are "bad" nor that they aren't equal to everyone else, merely that i find it disgusting. Why do so many feel that I'm not entitled to my opinion merely because it isn't what they themselves think? I find sexual fetishes that involve children, piercing of skin, all those weird things to be disgusting including gays. I do not hate gays. Why do people feel they need to condemn me for this thought?

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NoNameC68
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NoNameC68
5,043 posts
Shepherd

Other people are entitled to disagree with you.

EnterOrion
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EnterOrion
4,220 posts
Nomad

Condemn them for hating on you.

Or maybe you should not care. Why does it matter what other people think of you?

People can believe what they want, and other people can not like what other people believe. The world would be one boring a** place if everyone agreed with one another. Less violence, but less fun.

German3945
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German3945
996 posts
Nomad

Did you just relate being gay to violating children?

Or did you only relate them by the fact that you morbidly loath them?

Also, define their "lifestyle", and think twice before you do. Gays as a whole are moving further and further away from the orgy-party-loving dancing parading naked men that most people against gays focus on.

wajor59
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wajor59
909 posts
Nomad

I really had a tough time with this subject when my father came out of the closet when I was turning 13.

13 is such an odd time in someone's life anyway and for girls it can be extremely frightening. Just being able to face this person in the mirror every morning can be traumatic because just last night: this wasn't there and that didn't look that way and what's that zit doing between my eyes! Also, for girls, we need our fathers according to &quotsyche" professionals, more than our mothers.

I was so blown away by looking at a Christmas card that was addressed to "the----------family", but the sentiment inside was very personal and private that it made me blush.

I was so embarrassed and mad at my mom for "displaying" this foreign invader's comments to my father that it took a lot of self-control not to turn into "storm" on the x-men and go looking for this creep.
This was only the beginning,
as we lived in a tiny little town where everyone one in the county goes to the same HS. The year was 1972, race riots, national guard being called out to the HS 3 times, different dramas unfolding every week...

I was in 8th grade and had a circle of girlfriends, we ate at the same table for lunch, blah,blah,
until one day when everyone else stood in unison and moved to the far end, of a long banquet-style table.
I took it. Eyes front and center as if nothing happened until the one girl that I thought was my bff started shouting out that my father did this and that and was out-of-town a lot but not because of work...
I calmly stood up, even though my knees were shaking, and after I returned my tray to the cafeteria I approached the group. I said,"so what if my father goes out of town and actually does the things your saying, I'm still the same, I haven't changed!" When she didn't reply I flipped her off, not very Christian of me I know but anger was slowing getting a firm grip on me, I called her a liar and screamed that the only words I wanted to hear from her was I'm sorry.
I felt confused, betrayed by my father. How could he do such a thing? How long did my mom know? Is this why she always locked herself in her room? I also felt disgusted at the thought of two members of the same sex even holding hands...

During my summer of hell we as a family moved to Charlotte,NC and my life totally changed, faster pace, better schools, soon I wasn't even thinking of old what's-her-name.

I was completely ok with my dad because he was dad and our relationship was just beginning to grow.

I'll never understand the lifestyle but that doesn't matter and it's
none of my business. I look at gay people the same way I look at people of another faith, race or culture as simply another piece of a huge beautiful quilt. "Crazy" quilts look great because the colors are random.
I used to watch my grandma hand stitch her quilts and I could always tell if she was working on a crazy quilt because she would turn her back to the bed and literally thrown the pieces over her shoulder.

FireflyIV
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FireflyIV
3,224 posts
Nomad

I find the "lifestyle" of gays to be disgusting. This is my opinion, am i not in-tilted to it?


What exactly would you call a gay lifestyle and why do you find it so disgusting? If you can't answer those questions, perhaps you'd better come up with a decent reason why I shouldn't consider you either at best a troll, and at worst ignorant and bigoted.
PanzerTank
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PanzerTank
1,707 posts
Nomad

@whyismynametom How unfortunate of you because most people that I've known or seen agree with you on your gay thoughts. Just ignore them is my advice. I wouldn't know why they condemned you because I'm not them but they probably condemned you because you think love between two people of the same sex is disgusting.

@FireflyIV This thread has nothing to do with why he thinks gays are disgusting. He just wants to know why people condemn him for thinking that way since what you said didn't even answer the OP, I don't know what to consider you either at best a troll, and at worst ignorant and bigoted.

XVERB
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XVERB
3,137 posts
Nomad

i agree with you. you don't hate gays you just think that what they are doing is disgusting. Its the same with me and the pot-heads at my school. i think that they are really nice people but i think that smoking reefer is wrong and sometimes will say something. they who ever i said it too will probly defend them for some reason.

Zophia
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Zophia
9,434 posts
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This thread has nothing to do with why he thinks gays are disgusting. He just wants to know why people condemn him for thinking that way since what you said didn't even answer the OP, I don't know what to consider you either at best a troll, and at worst ignorant and bigoted.
Now that was fairly ignorant of you (if you want to keep tossing the "NO U" like argument).
He wasn't off topic. He got a bit tangential, but he wasn't off topic. And quite frankly I find it relevant to know the OP's reasons to think the way he do, if he wants to understand why others think of him the way they do. It's kinda connected.

But seriously, people should stop it with the name calling (that goes to both FireflyIV and PanzerTank in this case, but really to anyone who fling the "you're ignorant!" remark around a little too lightly).

We're ALL friggin' ignorant. It just varies what we ignore.

Anywho.

I hear all this talking about "GAYS" and it seems anyone who doesn't like it is considered a "hater" of the gays.
Not liking is far from the same as hating; but, expressing your dislike is easily misunderstood as hate if you don't choose your words carefully, or if the ones you're talking to just happen to misunderstand you.

I find the "lifestyle" of gays to be disgusting. This is my opinion, am i not in-tilted to it?
You are entitled to your opinion. As NoName said, others are entitled to disagree with you. As a side-note, "disgusting" is a really good word to use to get people into a heated discussion (aka it's a really bad word to use), because it's a strongly negative word (this may also be why you'd be seen as a "hater&quot.

I'm merely saying it is disgusting not that gays are "bad" nor that they aren't equal to everyone else, merely that i find it disgusting. Why do so many feel that I'm not entitled to my opinion merely because it isn't what they themselves think?
Because you are calling it disgusting. See above. Try going "I don't approve of gays because [insert reason here], and I really do not want to look at them being gay, but if they're gay outside my field of vision I don't care as much and they are entitled to rights and stuff". If that sounds about right.
That most likely won't make people consider you a hater.

I find sexual fetishes that involve children, piercing of skin, all those weird things to be disgusting including gays.
Homosexuality isn't a paraphilia (fetish), though. It's a sexual orientation, a preference of your partner's gender. Also, again with the disgust. That you say you are disgusted makes you sound like you are hating on whatever.
Oh, and comparing gays with pedophiles is another really good way of convincing people you're a hater. So, uhm. Yeah, if you don't want them to think so, start thinking more carefully about your choice of words.

I do not hate gays. Why do people feel they need to condemn me for this thought?
Because you sound like you do hate.

Compare something here:

I think it's absolutely disgusting to eat meat. I can not imagine why anyone would ever find a stake tasty or even remotely delicious-looking. I can not comprehend the attraction to the consumption of flesh. Someone had once accidentally put a tiny piece of pork on my pizza at a pizza place, and I almost puked when I realized what I'd just gotten in my mouth. Meat consumption is disgusting to me.
Do I hate meat eaters? No. Did I just sound like I did?

I'm the only vegetarian in my social circle. Do I go around telling meat eaters that their meals make me cringe a little if I think about what it would be like to eat that? No. Because that would make me look like an incredibly stupid and intolerant person.
I accept that they eat what they do and let them like it as long as they don't try to make me taste. I won't cook them meat if they're visiting, and I surely won't eat any if they're serving it when I visit, but mutual respect means that it is never a problem.

Respect people you disagree with. It makes the difference between a hater and someone who just doesn't like it that way.
deserteagle
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deserteagle
1,633 posts
Nomad

I find the "lifestyle" of gays to be disgusting.


I could say the same for your lifestyle. Why can't two people love each other? If you want to obstruct relationships, then I consider you a bad person.

really had a tough time with this subject when my father came out of the closet


Ummm..... wow..... awkward... especially for your mom.....
If he was gay, why did he marry a straight woman and have you?
deserteagle
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deserteagle
1,633 posts
Nomad

I can not imagine why anyone would ever find a stake tasty or even remotely delicious-looking.


Neither can I. Pointy Wood just doesn't taste good.

Steak on the other hand is very good. xp

Respect people you disagree with. It makes the difference between a hater and someone who just doesn't like it that way.


very true. Its okay to disagree, but its generally frowned upon to hate, and be a jerk and tell how everyone is wrong other than you.
PanzerTank
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PanzerTank
1,707 posts
Nomad

Now that was fairly ignorant of you

How so?

But seriously, people should stop it with the name calling (that goes to both FireflyIV and PanzerTank in this case, but really to anyone who fling the "you're ignorant!" remark around a little too lightly).

I wrote he was ignorant because he lacked the knowledge of how to respond properly.

He got a bit tangential, but he wasn't off topic. And quite frankly I find it relevant to know the OP's reasons to think the way he do, if he wants to understand why others think of him the way they do. It's kinda connected.

Theres an OPION.

We're ALL friggin' ignorant. It just varies what we ignore.

Do you know what ignorant means?

Maybe later when I'm less tires I'll put other remarks to the rest of your comments.
PanzerTank
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PanzerTank
1,707 posts
Nomad

But seriously, people should stop it with the name calling

Ah yes I suppose we should (including me)
MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

Ummm..... wow..... awkward... especially for your mom.....
If he was gay, why did he marry a straight woman and have you?


It's pretty common for someone who is still in denial to get married and have kids.
Zophia
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Zophia
9,434 posts
Scribe

If he was gay, why did he marry a straight woman and have you?
Plenty of gays try to be straight because society treats gays badly. And it's quite possible that he really did love that woman. Not all love is sexual. I wouldn't know, though, not my family being discussed.

Neither can I. Pointy Wood just doesn't taste good.

Steak on the other hand is very good. xp
Oh bloody hell. That's the first time in... A LONG time anyone have caught a misspelling of mine. :<
You got the point, though. :P

very true. Its okay to disagree, but its generally frowned upon to hate, and be a jerk and tell how everyone is wrong other than you.
Exactly. Hate is a strong emotion and should be expressed with caution. Slip in an "I'll agree to disagree if there's no way we're gonna come to a mutual agreement" instead. Especially if you're arguing on the internet. You won't achieve anything anyway, might as well take it lightly.

I wrote he was ignorant because he lacked the knowledge of how to respond properly.
I said it was ignorant of you partially as a joke (hence what I said in parentheses right afterwards), and partially because it's not gonna make him any better at responding that you call him a troll, or ignorant, or bigoted. If you want to improve his knowledge of how to respond properly, help him. Don't insult him.

How so?
See above. Mostly kidding, also facepalming at the futility of the name calling.

Ah yes I suppose we should (including me)
\\o//

Theres an OPION.
You are correct, but notice that my font is blue. I can delete off topic posts and things that are completely irrelevant to the thread in question.
So if you find that someone makes such a post, please post a link to it on my profile. Or another moderator's. Or go tell Carlie that I'm being a bad mod by not agreeing with your opinion about that one post being relevant to the thread.
The actual point in this: Complaining about the relevance of a post in a thread in a reply to the thread (crap, run-on sentence) isn't gonna do much good. If you think the post shouldn't be there, request it deleted. Otherwise accept that the thread is straying a little bit from the main topic.

Actually discussing this is way more off topic than he was anyway~

Do you know what ignorant means?

"lacking knowledge or awareness in general", according to my dictionary. Are you saying we don't all have something we're not well equipped to discuss?
I'm likely to make horribly ignorant statements if I start discussing politics or religion, or specific things about science, because I really don't have a good grip on any of those subjects. Most people do. Others are clever enough to stay quiet and only say things they're sure about (some of Strop's posts in this section would be a good example of that behaviour).

I wing it. I'm not afraid to be wrong with my little walls of text if it means someone will teach me something new when they discuss with me. I argue to the best of my ability and knowledge, but I'm only 19 and I've only seen so much of the world yet. Still learning. But so are most people.

Woots for going off topiiiiiiic~
Zophia
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Zophia
9,434 posts
Scribe

I'm likely to make horribly ignorant statements if I start discussing politics or religion, or specific things about science, because I really don't have a good grip on any of those subjects. Most people do.
Wow, this came out looking different than I intended.
Meant: Most people are (likely to make ignorant statements if they discuss things they don't know enough about).
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