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Forums → The Tavern → [necro]Atheists make a God

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MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

I'm sitting here joining in on a Blogtv charity. And we just made a god.

This God is a Rainbow colored Brazilian shemale, that wields a Dildo that shoots lighting. This God is not racist or vengeful, and there is no afterlife.

The commandments of this god is as follows
1. Think for yourself
2. sort your own **** out
3. no killing
4. no stealing

This god doesn't care if you honor your parents or not, doesn't care if you lie, doesn't care if you covet your neighbors *** and doesn't care if you commit adultery.

So in under an hour that's what a bunch of atheists in a charity can come up with by commity.

Oh, and thanks to artistic rendering this god has no pants.

  • 255 Replies
MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

Some more songs to add to the hymns list.
Pennywise - My God
KISS - God gave rock n roll to you
And of course everyones favorite hymn to make out to.
In A Gadda Da Vida - Iron Butterfly

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

So, who's part of the priesthood of this religion? because I gather there's a preisthood.

MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

Does this mean door to door vibrator salespersons are missionaries?


There's such a thing as a door to door vibrator salesperson?
TackyCrazyTNT
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TackyCrazyTNT
1,936 posts
Peasant

So, who's part of the priesthood of this religion? because I gather there's a preisthood.


There are not that many members, but they are in my about section. :/
MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

There are not that many members, but they are in my about section. :/


I helped make this god and I don't even get a spot?! WTF?
TackyCrazyTNT
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TackyCrazyTNT
1,936 posts
Peasant

You have to ASK for a position!
You don't have to be a priest, either. You can be a messenger, or a whatever-you-want.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

SPREAD THE AWESOME WORD! Aethist God helps fund medical research! Also, sandwiches are delicious

Adrokila
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Adrokila
139 posts
Nomad

I'd agree to this but the god better worship me.

valkery
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valkery
1,255 posts
Nomad

Joining the party late, as usual....


Quick question. Would God use his awesome dildo of electrical might to strike dead anyone that is being idiotic?

TackyCrazyTNT
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TackyCrazyTNT
1,936 posts
Peasant

Quick question. Would God use his awesome dildo of electrical might to strike dead anyone that is being idiotic?


High Priestess says "If they are deemed idiotic enough, then yes."
MageGrayWolf
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MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

High Priestess says "If they are deemed idiotic enough, then yes."


Now now, that would go against commandment #2 and the non vengeful nature.
TackyCrazyTNT
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TackyCrazyTNT
1,936 posts
Peasant

Nope. Commandment 2 is "Don't steal"

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

What about the "Don't Kill"?

TackyCrazyTNT
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TackyCrazyTNT
1,936 posts
Peasant

Oh yes. I misread the question. The God of Sandwich can strike anyone idiotic, but not strike dead.

wolf1991
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wolf1991
3,437 posts
Farmer

Lightining generally is a good way to kill someone. So, what about, I dunno...using the dildo for...other purposes.

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