ForumsThe TavernLame Jokes/puns

357 83644
Turtelman1234
offline
Turtelman1234
2,911 posts
Nomad

What is the lamest joke or pun you've ever heard? It could've made you laugh uncontrollably, or it could've made you not laugh at all.

I'll start everyone off with some:

The Eenergizer Bunny was arrested, he was charged with battery.

What washes up on tiny beaches? Microwaves

  • 357 Replies
jt25rox
offline
jt25rox
332 posts
Peasant

how do you wake up lady gaga

Poker Face

CommanderPaladin
offline
CommanderPaladin
1,531 posts
Nomad

How do you sell a used, foreign-made car that's in really bad shape and has weeds growing through it?

Post an add saying you have a Buick for sale. When whoever stops by and asks where it is, show him the clunker and tell him it's the Buick - Beat Up Incomplete Car Kudzu.

MrStuff
offline
MrStuff
1,626 posts
Nomad

Why did the bird get in trouble?

He was using fowl language.

>_>

Ernie15
offline
Ernie15
13,344 posts
Bard

My girlfriend broke up with me because she said my stories don't make any sense.

Anyway, that's how I saved Christmas.

greentrev106
offline
greentrev106
179 posts
Shepherd

The first joke made me laugh at it's stupidity, anyway, I found this joke on a Laffy Taffy wrapper

How did the dinosaur come out of the pool...wet

masterofexitpath
offline
masterofexitpath
598 posts
Nomad

These jokes suck more than Dracula.

MageGrayWolf
offline
MageGrayWolf
9,462 posts
Farmer

Knock knock
Who's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
I thought you said you'd never forget?

CommanderPaladin
offline
CommanderPaladin
1,531 posts
Nomad

Knock knock
Who's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
I thought you said you'd never forget?


Really bad taste there MGW.

__________________________________________________________________________

Why should pencil drawings never get involved in the underworld?

They're too easy to rub out.
alovera1
offline
alovera1
510 posts
Peasant

whats the difference between illeagal and unlawful



illeagle is a sick bird

Turtelman1234
offline
Turtelman1234
2,911 posts
Nomad

This could be considered an add-on to MGW's joke.

9/11 jokes are just PLANE wrong.

Really bad taste there MGW.


Lighten up. They're jokes, I've heard much worse jokes being told about Jewish people, people that belong to any race other than white, and dead babies.
CommanderPaladin
offline
CommanderPaladin
1,531 posts
Nomad

This could be considered an add-on to MGW's joke.
9/11 jokes are just PLANE wrong.
Really bad taste there MGW.
Lighten up. They're jokes


There are some things that it just ain't right to joke about.
-----------------------------------------------

How do dried grapes with bad attitudes spend their free time?

Raisin Hell.
fukwon
offline
fukwon
283 posts
Farmer

what do you get when you cross a grape and a lion?

... a grape no one wants to mess with.

CommanderPaladin
offline
CommanderPaladin
1,531 posts
Nomad

What do you get when you cross a grape with an armadillo?

A grape that will not juice, no matter how hard you squeeze.

masterofexitpath
offline
masterofexitpath
598 posts
Nomad

these jokes still suck more than Dracula..no...more than Nosferatu.

CommanderPaladin
offline
CommanderPaladin
1,531 posts
Nomad

Suckiness is in the eye of the beholder.

Man, that beholder seriously needs some safety glasses.

Showing 196-210 of 357