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apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

There seems to have been an issue going on between @MattEmAngel and @StormWalker that needs to be settled in court. The dispute has been going on in the 'AG Love Circle 2015' thread, so much that mods had to have shut it down. Now, here's how this is gonna work:

We're gonna settle this in an orderly fashion, court case style.
Roles:
@JACKinbigletters -Judge
@Doombreed - Bailiff
@Pieguyme - Jury member
@TheMostManlyMan - Jury member
@FishPreferred - Jury member
@nivlac724 - Jury member
@evilsweetblock - Jury member
@MattEmAngel - Matt's lawyer
@Riptizoid101 - Storm's lawyer
@MattEmAngel - Defendant
@StormWalker - Plaintiff
@apldeap123 - Court recorder

Now, if anyone would like to apply to be part of the jury (1 spot left), Matt's lawyer or Storm's lawyer, please say it here. The hearing begins in two days!

Edit: pick wasn't really involved in this from the start. Pie was, though.
Edit: Yes, Matt is going to defend himself.
Edit: Hopefully Jack can show up in time for the trial, if not, the trial is rescheduled for Thursday, March 5, at 3:30 EST. Everyone needs to be online for this to work.
Edit: Trial has been moved to Thursday, March 5, at 3:30 pm EST. All must show up at that designated time or will face charges of failure to appear before court when summoned.
Edit: Jury size has been downsized from 9 to 5. Positions still open!

  • 180 Replies
TheMostManlyMan
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TheMostManlyMan
5,835 posts
Chamberlain

In the interest of not being left with the hardest job in the world, I'd like to sign up as a juror .

FishPreferred
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FishPreferred
3,171 posts
Duke

1 Isn't PieGuy Storm's attorney?
2 What's the going rate for jury wages?

Riptizoid101
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Riptizoid101
6,257 posts
Farmer

I WOULD LIKE TO BE STORM'S LAWYER! GET READY FOR MY CONVINCING ARGUMENTS AND WITTY REMARKS.

apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

@FishPreferred

1. I don't remember hearing Pie say anything about him being Storm's lawyer.
2. Pay is at $300 per day for each day of the trial.

FishPreferred
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FishPreferred
3,171 posts
Duke

Will this court be conforming to US legal procedure (or analogous)?

If so, I apply for the position of juror #3.

FishPreferred
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FishPreferred
3,171 posts
Duke

I'd like to hire @FishPreferred as my attorney at law, at a wage of 50 fresh salmon per case.

Hmmm. With $300/day, I can afford substantially more salmon, so I'm going to stick with the original plan.
apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

@FishPreferred

So, if you're going to be Matt's attorney, then who am I?

apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

But Fish said that he preferred to be a juror (no pun intended there). So who shall be your attorney?

apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

True that. If he does accept, I feel bad for whoever's going to be Storm's lawyer.
My best offer is $300 per day. Your move?

Riptizoid101
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Riptizoid101
6,257 posts
Farmer

feel bad for whoever's going to be Storm's lawyer

YOU HEATHENS DO NOT BELIEVE IN THE MIGHTY POWER OF RIP?

Beware, for belittling a brilliant brain may bring about behemothic bulks of bitterness and tribulation, be it may be the case that the bench appropriately calibrates the proofs objectively, for this will be the last instance a belligerent vagabond defaulter such as oneself would brave bringing forth umbrage from me with such brevity.

SirLegendary
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SirLegendary
16,585 posts
Duke

Edit: I think I'll just watch from a distance, don't want to be too involved. Hopefully things stay clean.

Riptizoid101
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Riptizoid101
6,257 posts
Farmer

"Best offer" is wrong. I mean "how much do I have to pay you to be my lawyer?"

You can pay me too so that I won't beat you down into the ground so hard.

http://www.gifbooster.com/wp-content/uploads/5549/cartoon-characters-ohhh-meme_53_paused.jpg

apldeap123
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apldeap123
1,708 posts
Farmer

Yo, what just happened? I ran in cause I heard shots being fired.

FishPreferred
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FishPreferred
3,171 posts
Duke

What....................................................................
.................................the?

Facts, reason, and the proper application thereof are his areas of specialty.

Which is why I'm better at deliberating than I am at persuading. Which is why I tend to avoid debates, politics, and other matters where success hinges upon public opinion. Which is why I'm not changing my role here.
SirLegendary
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SirLegendary
16,585 posts
Duke

Which is why I'm better at deliberating than I am at persuading. Which is why I tend to avoid debates, politics, and other matters where success hinges upon public opinion. Which is why I'm not changing my role here.

The public tends to only want to listen to what they want to here.

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