Forums → Art, Music, and Writing → Haiku Contest - Broken Bond (page 531, due: Feb 2)

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Maverick4

6,800 posts

Peasant

Posted August 24, '09 12:48am UTC

A Haiku is a Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.

Well, that said, heres the rules:

1) The Haiku must be original (no plagarizing)!
2) It must fit the weeks theme
3) It must be submitted before the deadline
4) It must be submitted for the contest (no using works previously written)
5) One Submission per user
6) The Same User cannot win twice in a row (but there welcome to submit!)

Hopefully oneday the winner could get a merit...

The Deadline will always be a Wednsday, so the deadline for the first theme will be Wednsday, September 2. The theme is The Pond

(special thanks to 'thisisnotanalt'

5,299 Replies

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acmed

3,517 posts

Nomad

Posted September 7, '11 11:30pm UTC

Ummmmmmmm... Mav's been online quite a bit but I still don't see any judging happening...

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mrTrippy

517 posts

Nomad

Posted September 7, '11 11:38pm UTC

Ummmmmmmm... Mav's been online quite a bit but I still don't see any judging happening...

Maybe the person who's picture he would like has not responded. he did say:
But I've decided to see if one of AG's own will be willing to have their picture as the select.

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Maverick4

6,800 posts

Peasant

Posted September 8, '11 1:14am UTC

Nah I don't think it will.... if your to busy to judge there has to be someone willing to do it

Ummmmmmmm... Mav's been online quite a bit but I still don't see any judging happening...

Please refer to the most recent rule, introduced a few weeks back. Thanks.

Maybe the person who's picture he would like has not responded. he did say:
But I've decided to see if one of AG's own will be willing to have their picture as the select.

Precisely.

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mrTrippy

517 posts

Nomad

Posted September 8, '11 1:21am UTC

Oh darn, well do you have an idea when the judging well happen?

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Maverick4

6,800 posts

Peasant

Posted September 8, '11 1:28am UTC

Oh darn, well do you have an idea when the judging well happen?

When TBear responds as to the status of her photo.

Please note, that from now on, I will be more proactive in removing 'spammy' comments from this thread. I will periodically contact a moderator to do this.

Until then, humor yourself with this picture of a 'unny' cat:

http://paulfraites.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/funny-pictures-kitten-and-stuffed-animal-make-a-pun.jpg

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acmed

3,517 posts

Nomad

Posted September 8, '11 11:12am UTC

@everybodywhogivesacrap, TBear has recently responded to Maverick this morning! He'll be finished tonight!

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TBear1996

46 posts

Nomad

Posted September 8, '11 4:36pm UTC

Sorry guys!!!! I've been really busy lately with school and GCSE's!

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Maverick4

6,800 posts

Peasant

Posted September 8, '11 11:39pm UTC

I am elated to present, the judging.
__________
5) FloydTC

ooh, I like ya waves
boom shaka laka laka
daamn, tide, you is fine

***ONLY*** because it game me the best laugh I've had in awhile. ONLY. You have an utter lack of both capitalization and grammar, but I still laughed my arse off.

4) EmperorPalpatine

When I looked her way,
Her beckoning undertow
Swept me off my feet.

I am reminded of Narcissus when I read this. Its a very simple haiku, and you capture the theme well. The use of the word 'her' is used twice, and rather close together. This gives a bit of an awkward, repeticiousness when read aloud. Overall, a good haiku.

3) Hahiha

Unhasty seesaw
Between two forces, drifting
Away into dreams.

This Haiku captured the theme on a deeper level. The 'unhasty seesaw' is a clear reference to the tide, and tells of a battle between two sides as the tide comes and goes. I feel that the third line slightly strays from this notion a little, so a little more work on that would have been appreciated. Still, good job, and keep it up.

2) Sk8terjiff

Life giver to thirst
Drawn by sirens, to ease flame
Immersed mind, soothes soul

I found this haiku to be the deepest haiku of the lot. While it abandoneds the 'tide' aspect slightly, it really focuses on the seduction of it. The imagery is very, very good, though better punctuation (Periods!) would have contributed so much to this haiku. Keep it up, and I look forward to more.

1) MusicMan102

Watch the waves roll in.
Hear them crash against the bank.
To them, I am drawn.

This haiku really captured the theme. Its very simple, and yet it isn't boring; it reflects perfectly a sense of melancholiness that is quite refresshing. While the other haikus give a sense of say, a muted red or a light violet, this one bleeds a more blue-grey. You have excellent punctuation and grammar, so congratulations! You've won this round. Go contact a moderator or administrator for your merit.
__________
For all those who did not place: If you would like to recieve a critique of your haiku, message me your haiku on my profile, and please state such. Messages without the haiku will not be responded to. Thanks.

I've decided to incorporate another photo as the theme this round, and I'm proud to present one from AG's own. Courtesy of TBear 1996, heres what you'll be writing about:

-Photo courtesy of TBear1996

TBear1996, and her photography thread.

The round will close at 11:59PM AG Time, on September 18.

Happy Haiku'ing.

I am elated to present, the judging.\r\n__________\r\n[b]5) FloydTC[/b]\r\n\r\n[i]ooh, I like ya waves\r\nboom shaka laka laka\r\ndaamn, tide, you is fine[/i]\r\n\r\n***ONLY*** because it game me the best laugh I've had in awhile. ONLY. You have an utter lack of both capitalization and grammar, but I still laughed my arse off.\r\n\r\n[b]4) EmperorPalpatine[/b]\r\n\r\n[i]When I looked her way,\r\nHer beckoning undertow\r\nSwept me off my feet.[/i]\r\n\r\nI am reminded of [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissus_(mythology)]Narcissus[/url] when I read this. Its a very simple haiku, and you capture the theme well. The use of the word 'her' is used twice, and rather close together. This gives a bit of an awkward, repeticiousness when read aloud. Overall, a good haiku.\r\n\r\n[b]3) Hahiha[/b]\r\n\r\n[i]Unhasty seesaw\r\nBetween two forces, drifting\r\nAway into dreams.[/i]\r\n\r\nThis Haiku captured the theme on a deeper level. The 'unhasty seesaw' is a clear reference to the tide, and tells of a battle between two sides as the tide comes and goes. I feel that the third line slightly strays from this notion a little, so a little more work on that would have been appreciated. Still, good job, and keep it up.\r\n\r\n[b]2) Sk8terjiff[/b]\r\n\r\n[i]Life giver to thirst\r\nDrawn by sirens, to ease flame\r\nImmersed mind, soothes soul[/i]\r\n\r\nI found this haiku to be the deepest haiku of the lot. While it abandoneds the 'tide' aspect slightly, it really focuses on the seduction of it. The imagery is very, very good, though better punctuation (Periods!) would have contributed so much to this haiku. Keep it up, and I look forward to more.\r\n\r\n[b]1) MusicMan102[/b]\r\n\r\n[i]Watch the waves roll in.\r\nHear them crash against the bank.\r\nTo them, I am drawn.[/i]\r\n\r\nThis haiku really captured the theme. Its very simple, and yet it isn't boring; it reflects perfectly a sense of melancholiness that is quite refresshing. While the other haikus give a sense of say, a muted red or a light violet, this one bleeds a more blue-grey. You have excellent punctuation and grammar, so congratulations! You've won this round. Go contact a moderator or administrator for your merit.\r\n__________\r\n[b]For all those who did not place:[/b] If you would like to recieve a critique of your haiku, message me your haiku on my profile, and please state such. Messages without the haiku will not be responded to. Thanks.\r\n\r\nI've decided to incorporate another photo as the theme this round, and I'm proud to present one from AG's own. Courtesy of TBear 1996, heres what you'll be writing about:\r\n\r\n[img]http://i636.photobucket.com/albums/uu88/crystal-babz/CIMG0760.jpg[/img]\r\n\r\n[i]-Photo courtesy of TBear1996[/i]\r\n\r\n[url=http://armorgames.com/user/TBear1996]TBear1996[/url], and her photography [url=http://armorgames.com/community/thread/8197725/tbear1996-my-photography-art-not-professional/page/3]thread[/url].\r\n\r\nThe round will close at 11:59PM AG Time, on [b]September 18[/b].\r\n\r\nHappy Haiku'ing.

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acmed

3,517 posts

Nomad

Posted September 9, '11 12:03am UTC

I've been prepared for this for the past month. I've been practicing in Haiku Land, and know I'm giving it another shot. *Phew*. Here I go...

Sunrise, by myself.
A bench for two, only me.
Alone til' sunset...

I have to admit I came on strong for this one!