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Chuck Norris doesn't believe in God, God believes in Chuck Norris.

1)
How was the giraffe born?

Chuck Noris Roundhouse-kicked a donkey!

2)
Chuck Noris, Arnold Schwartzeneger and Silvester Stalone go to heaven. They meet God who tells them:

We only have one place in heaven. Only one of you will claim it.

Stalone goes first to beg god to go to heaven:

Stalone:Oh my god please, i have become Rambo, i have killed dozens of Communists and Viet-Kong, I cannot be killed by anything, i have done body building so please, please let me go to heaven.

God: Very well, i will think about it.

Arnold goes second:

Arnold: Oh my God please i have become a terminator, i cannot be harmed by anything, i have exterminated everything, i have the best body in the world and appart from all those, i am the Governor of California. I believe i have succeded in my life so please, please let me go in heaven.

God: Very well, i will think about it.

And Chuck goes last.

Chuck Noris: Dude, you sit in my throne!

On the seventh day, Chuck Norris made God
... Yeah I made it up

-No, Chuck Norris made it up

I'm I the only one not laughing at this stupid attempt at making an already dumb joke better?

People breathe air, dragons breathe fire, Chuck Norris can breathe a vacuum.

Chuck Norris can delete the "Recycle bin" on his desktop

Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

When chuck norris enters a room full of young boys, he always leaves with a empty sack
and heres a fact about me, I hate chuck norris fanboy jokes.

Chuck norris visited the virgin islands, now it's just the islands.

Chuck norris doesn't do a push up, he pushes the earth down.

chuck norris can create a time portal by using a round-house kick to split space.

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris killed two birds with one stone, and two stones with one bird!

Chuck Norris can play the guitar.... with a piano!

Chuck Norris was once charged with attempted murdered in Boulder County. The judge quickly dismissed the case because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.

chuck norris went to the virgin islands, now it's just the islands.

if you manage to spell "chuck norris" in scrabble, you will win forever.

10 people die each year by searching chuck norris and unknowingly invite him to round-house kick you in your house.

Chuck Norris looked at Medusa and turned her into stone.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' computer will crash.

Chuck Norris once built a snowman..... in july.

Chuck Norris once bowled a 300. Without a ball. He wasn't even in a bowling alley.

Chuck Norris once built a robot with perfect human emotions. Fearing the possibility of not meeting Chuck's standards it promptly disassembled itself.

Chuck Norris won the 6 day war in 3 days

Chuck Norris completed the Kessel run in lass than 12 parsecs. That's right, he finished a timed race in distance!

Chuck Norris knows the best Chuck Norris jokes, but he doesnât believe in any form of submission.

Sorry.
Chuck Norris knows the best Chuck Norris jokes, but he doesn't believe in any form of submission.

i hope this fad never ends lol

Chuck Norris once played risk... it is now known as WWII