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Gantic
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Gantic
11,891 posts
King

Welcome to Slap the Cheese, a cheese-slapping game where you slap cheese.

HOW TO PLAY
1. Generate a Cheese if the cheese is dead by rolling d4 for hardness
1 = 10 HP = Soft
2 = 50 HP = Medium
3 = 100 HP = Hard
4 = 500 HP = Brick!
2. Update the cheese HP.
Optional: Narrate the above poster's action.
3. Roll d20 for Slap Damage.

EXAMPLE
Gantic: I make Gantic Cheese. 1d4=1

Player 1: Gantic makes a soft Gantic cheese.
Gantic Cheese: 10/10 HP
I slap Gantic Cheese. 1d20=2

Player 2: Player 1 lightly slaps Gantic cheese.
Gantic Cheese: 8/10 HP
I slap Gantic Cheese. 1d20=5

START
I make White Rabbit Cheese. White_Rabbit_Cheese = 4

DICE RESULTS
1 = 1d4
2 = 1d20
5 = 1d20
4 = White_Rabbit_Cheese
  • 2,479 Replies
bakkart
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bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Damage occurred from politicians kicking themselves for not having thought of the bad joke themselves.

Senate Cheese: 145/500

I give the cheese a hard high five for trying.

Whap = 19

DICE RESULTS
19 = Whap
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

You hit it's face really hard which made the cheese go to coma!

Senate Cheese: 126/500

I kick the cheese VERY hard! KICK = 1

DICE RESULTS
1 = KICK
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Unfortunately, your vicious kick isn't vicious in most places in the world. Sorry.

Senate Cheese: 125/500

I take off my white gloves and whip them across the cheese's face. "J'accuse!"

1d20=18

DICE RESULTS
18 = 1d20
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

You're boxing moves went hard on the cheese, enough to scare the cheese away of course.

Senate Cheese: 108/500

I mock the cheese about his looks 1d20=2

DICE RESULTS
2 = 1d20
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Evidently the cheese has a fairly high level of self-esteem.

Senate Cheese: 106/500

I slap the cheese with a subpoena.

Subpoena = 15

DICE RESULTS
15 = Subpoena
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

The cheese got afraid when Law was included into this, might give help us get some clues about the Cheese's background story.

Senate Cheese: 91

I slap the cheese with another cheese. 1d20=16

DICE RESULTS
16 = 1d20
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Turns out that this cheese is lactose-intolerant!

Senate Cheese: 75

New radical move: I just up and slap the cheese with my hand.

Old School = 17

DICE RESULTS
17 = School
HahiHa
offline
HahiHa
8,255 posts
Regent

Looks like a good old slap is still very much effective.

Senate Cheese: 58/500

I throw the cheese down a canyon. 1d20=8

DICE RESULTS
8 = 1d20
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

But the Canyon had a waterland laying inside.

Senate Cheese: 50/500

I throw the cheese out of the window! 1d20=2

DICE RESULTS
2 = 1d20
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Next time, shafaet, choose a higher window than the basement access window.

Senate Cheese: 48/500

I slap a "Price Reduced!" sticker on the cheese in hopes of selling it quickly.

1d20=9

DICE RESULTS
9 = 1d20
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

Turns out, the quality of the cheese doesn't appeal everyone that they'd buy it just for a Discount sticker.

I smash the cheese with a banhammer! 1d20=19

DICE RESULTS
19 = 1d20
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

Remarkably effective for a figurative expression! Good job!

Senate Cheese: 20/500

I play Slapjack with the cheese, except without the "Jack."

1d20=13

DICE RESULTS
13 = 1d20
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

It appears the cheese didn't enjoy the game even a bit.

Senate Cheese: 7/500

I launch the Final blow on the cheese! DIE!!! 1d20=20

DICE RESULTS
20 = 1d20
bakkart
offline
bakkart
636 posts
Prince

The cheese is dead. Hail the cheese. Long live the cheese.

Shafaet gets the Cheese Cross for his coup de grace.

New Cheese: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese 1d4=1

I test this new cheese out by slapping it tentatively with the back of my hand.

1d20=14

DICE RESULTS
1 = 1d4
14 = 1d20
shafaet
offline
shafaet
482 posts
Blacksmith

It seems the cheese didn't have a very a long lifespan, the back of your hand was hard enough to kill it before it even got a chance to come out into the wild.

Venezuaelan Beever Cheese: -4/10

New Cheese: Armadrillo Cheese 1d4=1

I fist bump the cheese to see if it is cool or not 1d20=3

DICE RESULTS
1 = 1d4
3 = 1d20
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