Forums → Forum Games → Slap the Cheese

You forgot adding some sharks, so there was only a meager effect.
Glue Cheese 31/500
I sprinkle it with a DashOfAsh = 14.

What was that ash made of? Whatever it was, it did some heavy damage.
Glue Cheese 17/500
Hey, sharks! There's an idea! Sharkattack = 19
EDIT: Game over!

(I change my cheese, I had a better idea)

It turned out sharks relished Glue Cheese! They fought each other over every last scrap of i. Indigestible as it was, the fishes found irrational worship towards this uncommon treat, and its unquotable flavor.

Glue Cheese -2/500 = kaputt.

Attention. From here on out, I bring to life this abomination. Beard_Cheese = 4

No! Another brick of cheese materializes...
Beard Cheese 500/500
I toss the cheese into the fires of Hades = 7.

You drop it on some charcoal. It's still hot, though, and singes the cheese.

B.Cheese: 493/500

I grab my sword and Slash = 4

It's a glancing blow.

Beard Cheese 489/500

I launch it into the vacuum of space.

Beard Cheese doesn't need to breathe, it remained unaffected.

Beard Cheese 489/500

I snipe it with CoilGun = 2.

You miss every shot, and though the heat does melt off a tiny part of it, its effects are ultimately negligible.

Beard Cheese: 487/500

With my slicing seemingly ineffectual, I try to Stab = 17 the cheese instead.

The stab penetrates right through the cheese, leaving an oozing wound that looks suspiciously like a cheese stuffed crust pizza slice.
Beard Cheese: 470/500
I take WarReperations = 1 from the cheese.

*Well, I meant to roll a die there...*
Your 'War Reparations' Don't mean squat to the cheese. The only damage comes from having to listen to you for too long.
I stomp the cheese with a giant Mecha = 19.

Giant Mecha squeezed the cheese ruthlessly. It's visibly flatter.

Beard Cheese: 450/500

I sing to the cheese a typical pop song. ChacarronMacarron = 5

The cheese is confused by the gibberish muttered by the singer and it's brain bursts trying to understand it. Sadly, it's brain is extremely small and nigh-useless. Welp.

Bear Cheese: 445/500

I apply ShavingCreamToTheCheese = 1

Bye turning the beard cheese into a bear cheese, shaving cream no longer applies whatsoever.

Beard Cheese = 444/500

I point my MatterDecompressor = 15 at the cheese.

The cheese is thoroughly decompressed. It scatters into several pieces.

Beard Cheese 429/500

I summon a Cheese_Eating_Dragon = 9

The cheese eating dragon, in all its might, flies down from the sky to bite the cheese off.

Then it slams into the cheese and dies. Ouch.

Beard Cheese 420(What a neat lil' number)/500

Alright, cheese, time to ShaveYouOff = 10!